It sounds like everything is going well, and the break is probably perfect timing. Now you can stop thinking about your sitch for a few days, and if you or him do think about it, the last memory on both your minds was a wondering evening.
Me: 43 W: 37 Together: 18 M: 15 D: 8 yrs old ILYBNILWY: March 2011 She Filed for D: August 2011 She moved out: Sept 1, 2011 Reconciled: May 2012 Divorce Case dropped: July 2012
Me: 30 W: 28 T 8, M 6 S: 7-27-2007 W filed (again) 3-2011 Served 8-2011 Responded, now dark "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear" MLK
Thanks to all my friends who have checked in on my thread and offered words of encouragement. We all know how much the support here means, and every post is appreciated.
My husband has had a great trip! He will be home tonight. The kids and I are all ready to see him. Our contact has been minimal, as he had no cell service, but he called every evening from the nearby lodge to check in. Our conversations were much like those in the "good ol' days." There was love in his voice and genuine concern and interest for not only how the kids were doing, but how I was doing as well. He always ended the conversation with "I love you," something he hasn't prompted at the end of a conversation in more than 3 years. I have remained positive and upbeat when talking to him...no whining about all the responsibilities here at home (like I would have in the past).
I can tell that this trip was very good for him. Not only was he with his friend I mentioned, but also with that man's father. My husband doesn't have the best father figure in the world (although he's also not the worst), so I'm glad that he got to spend some time with a truly loving and caring dad.
So, what happens from here? It will be interesting to see!
Very good thoughts lc4, I'm thinking the same things about Steve today.
Me: 30 W: 28 T 8, M 6 S: 7-27-2007 W filed (again) 3-2011 Served 8-2011 Responded, now dark "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear" MLK
Hi lc - I just wanted to stop in and say hi and to see how the H's return was. I hope you had a great evening last night.
Me: 43 W: 37 Together: 18 M: 15 D: 8 yrs old ILYBNILWY: March 2011 She Filed for D: August 2011 She moved out: Sept 1, 2011 Reconciled: May 2012 Divorce Case dropped: July 2012
Hey, NTX... I was just checking to see if you had updated your thread. Thanks for checking in with me; I hope things have been drama-free for you the last few days.
On my husband's way home, he texted me that this trip has made him realize he wants and needs to move back home. Yes, this is great news!!! We had a goal of him returning home around the holidays, but he's ready to officially start the process. I am proceeding with caution; I do not want to end up in this same predicament 6 months, a year or even several years down the road. I told him I'm thrilled he wants to return, but 100% commitment on both our parts to sticking to our changes is absolutely necessary; if he isn't ready to make that full commitment, we need to take more time. I also told him I don't want him to return because he feels like he "needs" to; I want him to WANT to live together as a family. He assured me this is the case. So...we go from here.
The kids and I were thrilled to see him last night. He arrived around dinner time, helped with some homework and put the kids to bed. He ended up staying the night, but the kids don't know that (he was gone before I woke them). They definitely know things are going well, as he embraced me when he got home last night in front of them, and we are obviously spending a lot of time together getting along. This is a FAR stretch from how things were in July!
I have some concerns and worry, most of all for the kids that he could twist off again, but I'm doing what I have to do...sticking to the changes I have made, working on my goals, maintaining necessary boundaries, etc. I suppose I'll start my next thread in "Piecing" and will still need the support of this board. My journey is far from over!
