I'm not sure how I would play it. I think you are wise to want to make sure this sitch doesn't come up again in the future.
I am not sure I have any advice on how to proceed. Some type of counseling will probably be helpful, if everyone is open to it.
If any other ideas pop into my head, I'll let you know.
Have a good weekend ma'am!
Me: 43 W: 37 Together: 18 M: 15 D: 8 yrs old ILYBNILWY: March 2011 She Filed for D: August 2011 She moved out: Sept 1, 2011 Reconciled: May 2012 Divorce Case dropped: July 2012
On my husband's way home, he texted me that this trip has made him realize he wants and needs to move back home. Yes, this is great news!!!
Wow, lc4!! That is incredible news!!
Originally Posted By: lc4
I am proceeding with caution; I do not want to end up in this same predicament 6 months, a year or even several years down the road. I told him I'm thrilled he wants to return, but 100% commitment on both our parts to sticking to our changes is absolutely necessary; if he isn't ready to make that full commitment, we need to take more time.
Exactly! There is no other way.
I am still lifting you and family up in prayer, lc4! Thanks for sharing the great news! Very encouraging. I think you're treating in the right way, too - with caution.
My family had another spectacular weekend! Friday night, our family (plus a couple of the kids' friends) went to a movie of the kids' choosing. On Saturday, we had lots of soccer games, activities, bday parties to attend, etc. On Saturday night, H and I went on a REAL date! We got a sitter, went to a movie (his choice this time!) and hit our favorite coffee shop and bookstore afterward. It was SO enjoyable just doing the things we used to do regularly together. He is now spending every night at home. We worked on school work with the kids yesterday afternoon and just had a great evening together before back to school for the kids and work for him today. Next weekend, we are hitting the State Fair!
My thread is now over 100 posts. Instead of starting a new thread at this time, I'm just going to go with the flow. There is still much work to be done in my situation, and if I feel like I need some guidance or just want to journal or vent, I'll start a new thread then in Piecing. But for now, taking things day by day is working very well for me.
I don't know what will ultimately happen in my marriage (no one, including people who think they have the most secure marriages, do), but I do know a few things. One, no matter what is to come, my children will always know that I did everything I could to save my marriage. I didn't give up and walk away, when certainly that would have been much easier to do MANY times. Also, I know that I can make it through some tough times and not only be "okay," but be GREAT. I've made so many crucial changes in who I am, how I treat others, speak, think, react, etc, and I've grown in my relationship with Christ. I know there is still lots of room for improvement in me, and I look forward to continuing to make my changes.
The support I have received from this board has been priceless, and I will continue checking in here to give my dear DB friends support in all of your situations. I can say this...if MY situation could be turned around, ANYONE'S can! My H and I hit rock bottom as a couple and as individuals. We are both making our way back out of the pit and to solid ground, together and on our own. If we can do it, any of you can, too.
Wow, lc4 - you give us all hope. Congratulations and may God continue to bless you and your family.
I am feeling so hopeless at this point in my situation, and have been wondering whether to throw in the towel and just give up, or stay and fight even though I seem to be the only one doing the "fighting" right now. However, I know that's what this journey is about, and you are a shining example of how to do things right. Step by step. In faith. With God at your side.
thank you for the post - it warms my (very sad) heart. I know God can work miracles, and you are proof of that.
lc4, I am SO happy for you and your family. It's great to hear stories like yours, and I've followed yours for some time now. It is SO encouraging to hear this, too, espcially for those of us in the trenches.
You're definitely pointed in the right direction. Make sure to take your time and do it right.
I continue to keep you and your family in my prayers. ((()))
lc, I'm so happy for you and your family. I saw so many similarities in our sitches in the beginning of our journeys which is one of the reason I followed your story so closely.
And now we are both slowly healing our marriages. Truly amazing.
Big Hugs, lc. Sending you prayers and positive thoughts always. ((()))
Ic4- I was reading your thread from the beginning and I found this towards the end of September.
For so long, I focused primarily on H's problems he brought to our marriage, but when I take a very honest look at the situation, I see how many of my behaviors have contributed to the breakdown of our marriage as well.
I felt the same way. I was so focused on the problems he brought to this marriage, that I was not looking at my own behavior. In addition, once I started to focus on my behavior, I started to find peace within myself.
