Way back in 2004 a friend advised me to try St Johns Wart to help me cope with what was the beginning of years of crap. I've been in such a funk of my own this year so I started taking it again. I think Dr Oz said that St Johns Wart also helps with blood pressure so I can kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
Today was H's birthday and he was a jerk, so I mirrored him.
The show season has begun and 'my' group is off to a fantastic start in a new event this year. H actually gave some thought to joining in before he decided no. Too bad for him, my life goes on.
BIL is in progress of a long rehab/recovery. H and I are working together on some fundraising projects for him to help get thru this acute trauma until the next stage starts. Is it ironic how well we work together yet can still be in disagreement about things?
I wish you all a safe happy holiday weekend. Keep your eyes open for the other drivers.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
WCW, Glad to see that you have posted. I'm sorry to hear that your h was a jerk today, not making excuses, but he may still feel under a lot of pressure about his brother and his family.
I hope that your bil is doing better. It's a long road of recovery for him. I think it's wonderful that you and your h are doing some fundraising projects for him. He's going to need a lot of encouragement in the months to come.
I'm so happy to see that your group is off to a great start. I hope it continues and I hope that your h misses what he could have particpated in. Long story short...live your life.
Have a safe and happy holiday. BTW, you might want to start a new thread before Jack rolls around to remind you!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Overall life is good. I always wish I/we/us could be better and I can get pretty cranked that H won't put more effort into us. But, and there's always a but, I hear the woes of so many other people and overall I think I got it pretty good.
We've been working together on a lot of things, often have the same ideas and opinions.
The part that still tantalizes me about all of this growing back together is that something just seems to be missing, yet I can't put my finger on the whats and whys. Just like there was always a piece missing that I could never figure out why H would never pull the plug and finally leave.
So to wrap up, I guess in what I consider my happy life there is always more I want with a piece missing of how to get it, or lose it.
Overall, life is good.
Chin up, eyes on the horizon.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
We have friends that are separated for almost a year and she wants her H to come home. She asked my H what he thought she should do, coming from a mans perspective. H said that since today is a special day for them she should offer dinner with her and the kids, and at dinner she should say we're going home now to have ice cream and you're welcome to join us.
Oh wow, that is the same wording I would say to my H while he was all fogged up for so many years! Now he is giving that as advice to someone else. Too funny!!!
My H also told me that this friend needs to move on with her life and stop just waiting for her H to come home. She needs to keep moving forward and let her H come along if he chooses.
There is the words straight from the horses mouth of an MLCer.
It's so odd to hear my H say all that, especially knowing that when I finally got over the acute trauma of his MLC that is almost exactly what I did.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
WCW, Sounds like your h learned something along the way. Your h couldn't hear or focus on what you and others may have said to him during his crisis, but he never forgot what was said to him. He will be a good mentor for others who are suffering from the MLC craziness.
I wish your friends the best of luck.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
H and I still plug along, still married, and on the surface we are good. We have not truly fixed our problems, and my stubborn cowboy is still proud and stubborn. I love him, and I know I put up with too much.
I have talked about the financial fiasco H got himself (us) in, and he is tired of being tied to so much debt. He is finally talking about searching for options to refinance or consolidate and reduce all his payments to something affordable. Our finances have been separated for a number of years, and his debt is his debt, and I basically pay everything else and he lives here free.
I ask about us and a future, his standard answer is he has no plans other than to stick around. What a romantic guy!
Tonight I dug a little deeper and asked if he was upset with life or upset with me, if he was happy with us and our M. He said he is upset about everything but not at me. He feels like a failure, everything he does is not enough, he wants dental work and to see a doctor but feels like he cannot afford that, he has recently learned that most of his male relatives are battling cancer or have died of cancer. I carry health insurance and have added back dental insurance that will begin in the new year. Yes the deductible is outrageous thanks to all the health care changes, but I told H he cannot afford NOT to go to the doctor and dentist.
My H is really a very smart man, but sometimes I think he is so busy playing the angles that he doesn't just do enough to get the work done.
Now my challenge is to figure out how to help him, support him emotionally, feed him information to eliminate debt, and not turn him against me for trying to solve his problems.
I have never seen H be so upset with himself and talk about being such a failure. This is new for me to deal with, and I am traveling in new territory. I am a bit scared when I hear him talk like this, he is just plum fed up with life.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
WCW, How are you doing? I know that you are worried about your h and the financial situation. Has he given any thought to meeting w/a financial adviser? You could always look into this angle and then gently broach the subject w/him.
He's got a lot to figure out and it's difficult to look at the whole picture when he maybe should be looking at it in bits and pieces. He's a very proud and stubborn man.
WCW, how would you break a wild horse? Maybe you need to try some of those wonderful skills that you have w/horses on your h for a while. They just might work.
Please take care of yourself. Keep in touch.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
