They are her kids. They are 12 and 14. Surprisingly there really wasn't a fight with her last night over the incident. She came in and was only mad about me dropping off her youngest. Aside from that all she said about the other guy was that he's just a friend and that she has never cheated on me and will not while we are together. She lied to me and said that she was over at her mom's and he was online and they were both bored and decided to hang out. I didn't bother to mention that she was emotionally cheating on me already. I didn't mention that I already knew she had been planning to meet up with him all day. I didn't argue with her I just simply said "ok" and watched Bollywood movies till about 3am. At which time she started trying to initiate sex with me and then stopped out of nowhere and went to the living room and emailed the guy a poem she wrote. She came back in a little bit later and said "we've been having sex too much and with everything between us and my family I'm not in the mood to be romantic" I didn't respond.
It's been really weird. She's emailing the other guy a lot. Talking bad about me to her mom,sister and daughters,ignores me a lot during the day but at night time she will want to have sex and talk. That part really throws me for a loop. If you don't want someone why continue to have sex with them? On one hand I know I should be denying her advances but on the other hand I..well to be blunt..just really like sex.
I hang out here in the bedroom and do my own thing. I go see friends. o my kickboxing class once a week. Go to the gym. My usual activities and do my best to remain upbeat in a situation that is really crappy. I feel like I need to do more to really DB because thus far these are my usual activities. Basically I try to avoid being in the same room outside the bedroom for any prolonged amount of time.
She's at work right now undoubtedly talking dirty to the other guy and speaking of their time together last night. She claims she was going to tell me yesterday about that she met up with him. Whether or not she actually would have though remains to be seen but I have my doubts. She said they did have plans to go back to his house so he could show her some of his art work. I'm sure that was not his actual intent based upon their emails.
Really uncomfortable around here today. Both kids are home so I'm watching them while my girlfriend is at work. Their grandmother is supposed to pick them up at noon. I'm really unsure how to act towards the oldest. She's been trying to talk to me today and I just honestly don't have a lot to say. I loved these girls like they were my own and I just feel so betrayed by her. She talks so much smack on her mother and I listen to everything she has to say and offer my own advice on what to do on anything from issues she has with her mother to when she get's bullied at school. When there is trouble in my own life she help endorse her mother's behavior. I am so confused on what to do. Just waiting on their grandmother to pick them up so I can get out of here for a little while.
She fessed up today. I have been checking her email off and on all day and there is a long conversation about how they wanted each other so badly last night if they had been given time. We were talking and she mentioned that I seemed a little more off today than normal and I said I am having some issues with everything last night and she went on to tell me how she was only intellectually attracted to him but the more they talk she has become physically attracted as well and that they have a strong chemistry between them. She said right now she is keeping it just as friends but she doesn't know where it's going. I know where it's going. She has a relationship she doesn't want and a new guy there that is showing her attention. It's only a matter of time.
I have been trying to do some DB'ing but it's really hard when were in the same house all the time. I try to get out as much as possible and keep up with my usual routines but it doesn't seem to be having any kind of affect on her at all. Or I'm doing the whole DB technique all wrong one.
I would say stop checking her e-mail, worry about yourself. She either is or she isn't going to sleep with the dude. If you keep all the focus on her, then odds are she is going to. He is a mystery to her right now. What are you?
Me 37/W 32 S 5 D 4 ILYBNILWY 5/12 Sep 8/12 Starting to find myself 11/12 on
As true as this is. I have been trying to avoid mentioning it to her. Like today for instance I know she kissed the guy during her lunch hour and was telling him how much she wants to have sex with him. I know I need to stop but it's just so hard to totally detach myself from all this.
Your right and that's what I'm trying to do. Just stop. It's really tough not to do,you know?
So took a day away from everything and managed to talk a friend into letting me stay a night at his place. I have resisted the urge as hard as it is to check her email. I don't think anything good will come from it. She text me yesterday to see when I was coming home. I told her I didn't know. What I did instead is and this was probably a stupid move as well but completely out of the ordinary for me. The girls text me and the oldest said she was staying with her nana and the youngest text me that she was going to stay with a friend but hoped to see me soon. So I drove home and cleaned the house up really well. I cooked filet mignon with baked potatoes,baby carrots and chocolate fondue with lots of apples and assorted fruits. Went and parked my car down the street walked back and waited. Came back put flowers all over the house. From the front door to the dining room I put a trail down to her chair and circled it with flowers. When it was close to time for her to be home I lit all the candles in the house and turned off all the lights. I stood in the hallway to where I could see her face but she could not see me. She came in and she was smiling. I stepped out from the hallway and she had the biggest smile on her face than I had seen in a long time. We had dinner and talked about anything other than the relationship. Several hours passed and she was still smiling. She went and put on music and we danced and danced. She kissed me for what seemed like an eternity. She then wanted to have sex. I politely told her that's something I can't do at this juncture. She nodded but still made advances. At the end of the night she came up to me and said thank you and told me how much it meant to her. She said it was nice to actually have me here. From what I gathered from that comment and the way she sounded she often times feels like I'm physically here but mentally somewhere else. I think that might have been a step in the right direction. She asked me where this all came from. I just kind of shrugged and got ready for bed. Altogether we ate,talked and danced from about 5:30pm til 2am. Today she called in to work because she said she wants some more time with me. At this moment she's still sleeping. I'm going to continue my routine of going to the gym and whatnot. I can't allow one really good night to put a halt to things. I have to keep reminding myself that one good night will not put a stop to the other boy.
So this might seem odd and it really does to me but thus far the other night seems to have really worked. I don't want to get my hopes up but things have been going really well. For the first time in awhile she told me she loved me. She is talking like she wants me to stay in the house. Like I said I'm not getting my hopes up this could be a fluke weekend so to speak. I'm going to keep going with the whole plan of moving on and see how things are when the time comes.
