When was BD for you? If I look at your first post I get the impression it was in November? So BD was about 2 months ago. You're still cycling through a range of emotions, that'll go on for a few more months yet. Just be patient, you've got plenty of time. Filing for D is NOT going to bring you any kind of relief. Work on you, get out and GAL, that is what will make you better!
That's up to you. I notice you tend to vacillate from wanting to work on it, to not all in a couple of posts. As everyone told you before, it is going to take alot of time and patience. More than the 3 months you've been in this.
My W didn't open up to me for 3 years. During that time she was working with her OM and it was her boss. It's going to take alot out of you, but it is up to you to determine whether you see this as a bad thing or an opportunity.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I agree BH that not filing/making her do the 'dirty work' is probably a good idea. I understand a bit while filing for you with the abandonment/affair would be better in the legal sense. However, that is only good if you think the divorce would get nasty and she is going to try to take you to the turf, financially.
Of course, I am not a lawyer and could have it all wrong! I think the WAS feels some guilt/remorse and I think it is their right to feel the full brunt of that. Not in a nasty vindictive way, just that that is the result of their actions so they must bear the consequences.
me 41 w43 married 20 years BD 10/10/13 ILYBNILWY.... 4 kids, 21,18,8,6
