Is your h working? He can be tracked down there and served.
I'm very sorry that things have gone from nuts to absolute insanity...you are far better off w/little contact. I do hope that you can wrap up your divorce this year and be able to breathe a sigh of relief very soon.
Please take care of yourself and your boys. It will get better and I think 2014 will be your year.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Not sure if he is working anymore...if he is I don't know where. The courts have been looking for him so they could garnish his wages for my support...no such luck so far. So no financial help from ex even though it was court ordered...he is about $11K in arrears.
I've given up on everything in regards to him...
So, the divorce won't be filed on my end either. It really is a waste of my resources at this time, and I'd rather not use them on my ex.
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
Sorry your H vanished on you. If he ever starts to show up again I hope it is with a cheque. Sounds like he has done incredible damage. And it sounds like you have come through it well.
You sound assuredly done. I envy that actually.
If it makes no legal difference to support etc I don't blame you for not wanting to waste the resources for a divorce. If either of you intend to get remarried you can worry about it then.
Nothing new on the home front MLC drama and madness continues, its just not new anymore, LOL. I'm feeling stronger and better daily. I'm happy, kids are happy, and life is just moving along just fine.
H has legally done a number on himself...not sure that he see rock bottom yet, but its coming.
I just wanted to pop my head out of the hole and say Hi.
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
I'm glad you stopped by. I'm happy to read that you and your children are doing okay and that life is moving along nicely.
Stop by again, don't be a stranger.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Some people never hit bottom. Look at Philip Seymour Hoffman, I know his demons were drugs but I really see a lot of similarities between drugs and MLC. He had two sides - 1 great and the other not so great.
---- M 39 H 35 D5,D4 M 4 T 9 ILYBNILWY 5/18/11 Left 7/11/11 Divorced 12/1/13
I'm so glad you posted, B. I have wondered about you. Have you had any contact with your h? Does he see the boys? It's good to hear that you all are doing well and don't give much energy to the MLC crisis. Take good care of yourself.
GM-I think a lot about you. Our sitches were always so similar and I pop in from time to time to read where you are in this journey.
I have had very minimal contact with H. Meaning an email about once a month about the children or financial matters. He ignores these emails or attacks me in them...blah, blah, blah. I had to pull the plug on H seeing the boys, because of a few reasons. I didn't know where the kids were "living" when they were with him and he refused to provide an address for a couple of months, his non paying of support with demands that I provide for our children when they were in his care, and his lack of parental responsibilities when our children were with him (he was not providing them with clean clothes or having them bathe when they were with him).
He hasn't seen them in about two months now, and of course throws out how I am in contempt of the court order over and over again. What he doesn't see is that he is in violation of so many court orders and morally isn't having good judgement to care for our boys.
His latest stunt was to change the health insurance plan the boys are on, and didn't notify me. My son is on monthly medications...that now cost me $230.00. When I asked him what the details of the new plan were he said "he wasn't going to discuss this issue until we were in court in front of a judge with his lawyer by his side." I kindly asked for his attorneys info so we could move forward with things...no response...I asked him two days later as the medical needs of our boys really shouldn't wait for him to do whatever it is he's doing and no response....Surprise Surprise.
He still thinks that ignoring the issues are going to make them magically go away...HAAA!
He throws out the words "attorney" and "divorce" like I care...has called me a unfit and unstable mother to and in front of our boys, all while losing himself, his assets, and his soul. He owes me about $9k in combination of supports, but runs around town saying I am mooching off of him. Ha...laughable.
He wants me to get rid of my car, cancel wi-fi, stop taking my kids out to dinner and doing small fun moments out like movies and bowling.
I know he can't stand that I have everything, but too bad. All I can say is boo-hoo!
He didn't see the kids on Christmas, didn't get them not one gift, or even ask them what they wanted. SAD. But had a nerve to buy his GF and her daughter things on MY credit card. It would have been nice if he actually stole the money to buy his OWN kids stuff...LOL!
The kids don't like him, have refused to talk to him, don't want to be around him. It breaks my heart, but it really is best for them to not be around him at this time...he is too destructive and still selfish.
H's mother has now sided with her son...bad mouth me to the entire family of in-laws and then had a nerve a week later to call me all nice and sweet, saying "I love you, MOM" ... Both my kids and I found out from another relative that did not agree. My kids are livid.
Hmmm. I'm not sure what else, but I know there is more, but it isn't anything different then what everybody has seen or heard I'm sure.
I've been dating a few nice men here and there...not committed to any of them and really just have fun. They all have their pro's and con's, but it has made me aware that I am a very special lady who deserves to have it all including someone just as special.
So, in MY journey, I am doing well. I have so much GOOD around me. People and things. I feel great and free.
Moving forward and living life one moment at a time and loving it!!!!
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
Wow! What a change from your early posts. I am so very happy for you. Knowing your worth, accepting the kind companionship of others and living day by day believing the future will be filled with greatness is a beautiful testament to how far you've come. You are truly inspiring.
I am sorry that your boys don't have their dad right now. My boys don't see their dad either, but it is in their best interest. I don't know what the future holds. We hope that xh will seek counseling and a new relationship can be built with the boys, but until then all contact has ceased.
You're doing great! Your life is precious and you know it. That's a beautiful thing.
