LOSING MY MIND and needing LRT help!!!!

[Vanilla]

T

You have released a stuck point and release gives movement. This is a really loving thing to do.

Am delighted for you that my post resonated

Vanilla

[HeavyD]

I wanted to chime in here.

My WAW was sexually abused as a child by her father for many years until she was about 9. I knew about it, but we never ever talked about it. I felt she would talk about it if and when she wanted to. I know this has affected her deeply and her world view and her realtionship views. When I look back, all of her love realtionships have been subversie (with her high school teacher, having affairs before we got married, etc...). I have brought this up in therapy, but she is resistant to talking about it. Should I continue bring this up in therapy and just let it lie and let her figure it out. I always thought I could help her with this issue, but I am learning that we can't fix other people.

Confused as usual

[T-Mom]

NAJ,

Do NOT ignore it if it affects your relationship. Are you still going to therapy together?

[T-Mom]

LOL, u-turn... I hear that!

[HeavyD]

Yes - still going to therapy. You think I just bring it up again out out of the blue?

Do you have a suggested script I can use to initiate the convo?

[Vanilla]

Yes - still going to therapy. You think I just bring it up again out out of the blue?

Do you have a suggested script I can use to initiate the convo?

Naj- I have responded on your thread.

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...519#Post2518519

Vanilla

[Vanilla]

T-mom how are you?

With Xmas on the horizon are there any issues?

Vanilla

[T-Mom]

Thank you for checking in on me, V. I have to say that now that H is sleeping downstairs in the den, I see him only when I choose to, for the most part. He does not hang out upstairs, but there is only 1 bathroom and kitchen, so he does use those. I have been pretty busy and I will continue to be busy through the Holidays. I asked him what part he wanted to take in festivities and he will be doing Christmas Eve and Christmas Day here. He decided not to go to the NYE celebration. I have no idea where his head is... either of them! lol...

[u-turn]

T-mom,
Does this space help you with your detachment? fewer eggshells to walk on? Just the space of my W not sleeping in bed anymore has helped me detach.

Staying busy is great for you. Enjoy the holidays with your son
Take care!

[T-Mom]

Thanks, u-turn. It definitely helps me to detach when he is not around. I have changed a few things around and he has had a few negative remarks about it, but I honestly can't even remember what they were. I have been ignoring his negativity, and even leaving the conversation when he makes a remark that I don't care for. I refuse to be his sponge for negativity anymore, as it is hard to maintain my own positive attitude when he does this. He is always in a bad place in the winter, and this year really is no different, in that respect. The Holidays are going to be fine, with or without him around. He really hasn't added much to any festivities lately, so I don't even miss him.