oh, and -- if it's genuine -- a "And I really appreciate the effort you are making. I can notice it when you ______ and ______, and I do appreciate that."
Just wanted to pop by and say hello and wish you a Happy Valentine's Day. My schedule has been whacky lately so I haven't been commenting much but I have been reading. I was sorry to read of your W's health issues, but glad it turned out to not be as serious as you had feared.
My thoughts and prayers continue to be with you, my fellow Arkie! Hope you have a wonderful day.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Starsky, I did ask her and she said that she didn't feel smothered or neglected by me. She responded positively that I appreciated the effort that she's making.
She's not in the dark place she was. She characterizes it as 'beige'. She's not desperately unhappy, but still feels disconnected from me. Withdrawal continues, but I'll take beige right now over black.
Last edited by Rzrback; 02/14/1509:56 PM.
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
I usually don't rant about commercials, but has anyone else seen that stupid graham cracker commercial about divorced families? The one where the father says "I didn't expect to get divorced, but the way I see it, my kids have more people to love them" or something like that. When a man has his future held hostage by a stupid, selfish, unfaithful woman, that's just what he wants to hear.
I'm still waiting to see the commercial about divorce and what it really does to children and families.
Just venting.
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
Yeah, well that's not going to happen. My H brought something to my attention years ago. Not only sitcoms do it, but commercials make the dad look totally incompetent at the most simple tasks. Look at the "comedy" (I use the word lightly) that we as a society are programmed to watch. The family man is not protrayed as a strong, respected leader. He is stupid and his W & kids constantly give him put-downs..........as the fake & taped laughter plays, to signal to us that this is acceptable. Our little boys are growing up believing they are to be dim-witted, bumbling, idiots who are M to beautiful, successful women living with the best money can buy.
Yes, it makes me very angry, and I refuse to watch the mess.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
