WAW Filed for D the Next Day Part 6 (Bob)

[Bob723]

Your next step?

Why do you need to ask? Of course, draft up your response and post here for feedback. I think you're ready to do this step yourself, no?

Dear "Wonka the Amazing,"

Actually I mis-wrote that. I meant to write, what should my response be?

Well....here is my draft. I am not sending it until you have time to read it and make any corrections you see fit. You are the pro and I find myself thanking God for you more often than ever before.

Bob's draft reply:

"You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds every day as prescribed and go to counseling 2 to 3 times a week. It does help me feel better. I can understand why you would be upset that people don't seem to listen to you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together, and I can see why you would feel confused. Take care, Bob"

Ok, now it's your turn Wonka.

Bob

[Bob723]

Wonka & All,

Just journaling. Our first date was 15 years ago today.

I updated my signature.

Bob

[Sotto]

"You're welcome, I hope you're back on your feet quickly. I am taking the meds and going to counselling; It does help me feel better. I miss you too W. Take care, Bob"

Hi Bob - of course Wonka is the pro here. But these are my thoughts...

T :-)

[rd500]

Hi Bob. I would agree with Toots and add the line about thanks for being honest about living together. As others have said this is a long road. reconciliation is nearly always possible and in your case baby steps are being faken I hope for the best for you , just don't let expectations creep in. My EXW will hug me , call me everyday , text me she misses me and tell the kids she wants to come home. All words Bob until you see actions try to keep expectations in check

Positive thought mate. Take care. Rd

[Defacto]

Bob,
Congrats on a little positive momentum in your sitch. I like the Toots text also. No expectations but let it inspire you to continue the good fight.

[Elly4]

"You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds and go to counseling It does help me feel better. I can understand why you would be upset that people don't listen to you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together, and I can see why you would feel confused. Take care, Bob"

I know Wonka will come by with the best answer. My two bits are above. KISS with the meds and counseling and took out the "seem to" phrase as although you are trying to validate her but the seem to makes it appear that you don't actually think she's right.


{{hugs}}}
E

[Wonka]

Bob,

Great that you've posted your draft response here. Nice first draft.

W's Original Response

"Thanks, I'll try. It could just be the beginning of an MS relapse too. By the way, are you still taking the meds and going for counseling? I'm just curious, you don't have to answer because it is really none of my business. It seemed to be helping you feel better, I was just interested if you feel the same way. My mom is actually taking (same med as me) now because she's been feeling stressed. I'd been trying to tell her try it for a while now and she says she's feeling better now too. IF PEOPLE WOULD JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR GOD'S SAKE!!! But no, no one ever does. I don"t know what to do - I miss you so much but I don't know if I can live with you. I need to come down sometime to discuss the house, we'll see. Take care, I'm very confused right now. Sorry, me"

Bob's Draft

"You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds every day as prescribed and go to counseling 2 to 3 times a week. It does help me feel better. I can un why you would be upset that people don't seem to listen to you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together, and I can see why you would feel confused. Take care, Bob"

Suggested Responses

Toots: "You're welcome, I hope you're back on your feet quickly. I am taking the meds and going to counselling; It does help me feel better. I miss you too W. Take care, Bob"

Erinn: "You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds and go to counseling. It does help me feel better. I can understand why you would be upset that people don't listen to you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together, and I can see why you would feel confused. Take care, Bob"

Wonka's Take

I wouldn't touch on W's confusion because you cannot really understand why unless she tells you outright. So I'd leave that alone.

Toots and Erinn have done a real good job with their suggestions so let's incorporate them. Bob, I think it would be an opportune time for you to show some of your vulnerability to W.

Here's my suggestion:

"You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds and go to counseling. It does help me feel better. Also have done some introspection and reflection which helps as well. I can only imagine how you would be upset that people don't listen to you...how frustrating it must be for you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together. I hope today is a better day for you. Take care, Bob"

[Pyrite]

hi Bob,

sorry it has taken me so long to catch up on your thread. I can't offer you any advice that is better than what you have already been given and know yourself. The text sounds promising and overall your situation is almost heartwarming compared to mine and some others I have come across with a down-right hateful WW.

Keep up the PMA. You are an inspiration my friend.

-Py

[Bob723]

Bob,

Great that you've posted your draft response here. Nice first draft.

W's Original Response

"Thanks, I'll try. It could just be the beginning of an MS relapse too. By the way, are you still taking the meds and going for counseling? I'm just curious, you don't have to answer because it is really none of my business. It seemed to be helping you feel better, I was just interested if you feel the same way. My mom is actually taking (same med as me) now because she's been feeling stressed. I'd been trying to tell her try it for a while now and she says she's feeling better now too. IF PEOPLE WOULD JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR GOD'S SAKE!!! But no, no one ever does. I don"t know what to do - I miss you so much but I don't know if I can live with you. I need to come down sometime to discuss the house, we'll see. Take care, I'm very confused right now. Sorry, me"

Bob's Draft

"You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds every day as prescribed and go to counseling 2 to 3 times a week. It does help me feel better. I can un why you would be upset that people don't seem to listen to you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together, and I can see why you would feel confused. Take care, Bob"

Suggested Responses

Toots: "You're welcome, I hope you're back on your feet quickly. I am taking the meds and going to counselling; It does help me feel better. I miss you too W. Take care, Bob"

Erinn: "You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds and go to counseling. It does help me feel better. I can understand why you would be upset that people don't listen to you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together, and I can see why you would feel confused. Take care, Bob"

Wonka's Take

I wouldn't touch on W's confusion because you cannot really understand why unless she tells you outright. So I'd leave that alone.

Toots and Erinn have done a real good job with their suggestions so let's incorporate them. Bob, I think it would be an opportune time for you to show some of your vulnerability to W.

Here's my suggestion:

"You're welcome, hope you're back on your feet quickly. I take the meds and go to counseling. It does help me feel better. Also have done some introspection and reflection which helps as well. I can only imagine how you would be upset that people don't listen to you...how frustrating it must be for you. I appreciate you being so open and honest about us living together. I hope today is a better day for you. Take care, Bob"

Hello Toots, Rd, Defacto, Eirinn, Pyrite and of course Wonka!

Toots and Eirinn, thank you ladies for the suggested changes.

Rd, Defacto and Pyrite, thank you for your encouragement and advice.

Wonka, dear Wonka, thank you for pulling it all together for me!

All, thank you for your time and continued support. I have no idea where I’d be now without you all.

I will send Wonka’s suggested text soon and keep you all updated.

I love you all – I mean it!!!

Bob

[Bob723]

All,

Text sent, but my W’s phone is off. I am sure she is still sleeping. I’ll let you know if she replies, and if so, what she writes back.

Thanks again for all your support. I am blessed to have such great friends.

Bob