WAW Filed for D the Next Day Part 9 (Bob)

[teach3]

Hey Bob, checking out your new thread. I love how people here jump in to help out with a text or a message. In our situations every word can make a difference.

Keep shining bright Bob you bring tremendous comfort to people here.

[Elly4]

Hi Bob! I know you asked Sandi about responding to your Ws recent texts, and I'm sure she'll chime in, but my two cents says stay dark. You responded to the part you needed to. Leave the rest alone.


E

[Bob723]

Hey Bob, checking out your new thread. I love how people here jump in to help out with a text or a message. In our situations every word can make a difference.

Keep shining bright Bob you bring tremendous comfort to people here.

Hello Teach3,

I am overwhelmed by the support we get from the loving DB Family. Isn't it amazing?

Wow, I am very flattered and humbled by your sentiment. Teach, you are so kind! I do my best, just as others here, including you, do.

Thank you so much. You made my night.

Bob

[Matt777]

Hey Bob, checking out your new thread. I love how people here jump in to help out with a text or a message. In our situations every word can make a difference.

Keep shining bright Bob you bring tremendous comfort to people here.

Hello Teach3,

I am overwhelmed by the support we get from the loving DB Family. Isn't it amazing?

Wow, I am very flattered and humbled by your sentiment. Teach, you are so kind! I do my best, just as others here, including you, do.

Thank you so much. You made my night.

Bob

I've been kinda quiet in your threads of late, Bob. I'm not great at text-crafting, so I'll stay out of the way to let the experts work. Just wanted to hop in and say thanks for your continued support to me. I definitely appreciate it.

Have another manly fist bump.

Have a great Father's Day tomorrow!

[sandi2]

You're on my daily prayer list of people I give thanks for.

Of all those sweet things you said to me, this is the one that means the most. Whenever I tell someone I will pray for them, I really mean it. I believe in the power of prayer, and I think you do, also. If it is not presumptuous of me, would you also add my H and D? I honestly know which will be passing away first. They are both going down in their physical problems at a fast rate. Thank you very much. Just sharing that with you helps me.

I appreciate your encouragement, Bob. There are several folks on the board I believe are natural when it comes to speaking positive words and encouraging the broken hearted. You definitely go into that category! I don't see how your W could not miss having you around her!

Any thought at all on her TMs from the other day, Fri 6/19? Where she apologized for her mean-spirited TM and even referred to it as "vicious" and then asked a favor of me (the clothes, etc). About the only time I hear from her is when she needs a favor. I re-posted it a little above your reply on page 3 of this thread.

To me, it looked as if she was taking her mean spirit out on the one closest to her, and therfore she resents the most (her H) and in her own way is rebelling against the M. Even if she was stressed out due to the debt collectors, it was not right for her take it out on you. In her WW heart, this stress she saw as being all your fault, so that was the motivation behind that text. Even her text where she called herself apologizing, I guess? There seem to be criptive dart throwing in your direction. I think this could be called a back handed apology. Do you know what those are? Where she hurriedly slides over her actually saing she was sorry....and immediately gave reasons to justify her mean mood. Well, apparently there aren't very many people who put up with her speaking to then in the manner she used with you.

I don't know how many minutes from when she sent text 1 and then sent text 2, but text 1 was to soften you up (just in case you had no intentions of cooperating with her request coming up on its heels. Question: have you ever noticed if she mentions some medical/health issue withing that same text or conversation? Almost canceling out the apology by sayin she was sick, so that was her reason,..........so there!

It has been my experience, while sticking around the boards these past eight years, and reading this type of emotional, radical, wide swing shots that could be summed up and put in a thimble, by saying you are the reason for all the wrongs in her life. But instead of dealing with it like mature, rational person would do........
she uses you for the scape goat. She feels that relieves her of the sin or responsibility. She believes you deserve to be the one they make accountable, not her.

The icing on the cake is when she comes back around to ask you to gather, pack, and deliver her things. Of course you feel setup! I believe anytime a WW is vicious in one message and blaming it on everyone except owning her behavior, then the next message will be her requesting you give of your time to go through her things and pick out the designated items and package them to mail.........I think it is much like preparing a goose for dinner. First you slay him, then buttering him up real good, and then turn up the heat.

You have a great big heart, Bob! I hope you have the capacity for much patience too. She is angry at her situation and is taking her anger out on you. I think she believes leaving you will somehow rid her of most of these problems. That is common for WW's who don't have health issues, with your W in her particular physical condition, it causes you much concern for her welfare. I think you will be tested in that area.

So, yes, I don't see her so called "apology" text as anymore that her taking another dig at you (backhanded apology) then buttered up for the kill (a favor).

[Bob723]

Hi Bob! I know you asked Sandi about responding to your Ws recent texts, and I'm sure she'll chime in, but my two cents says stay dark. You responded to the part you needed to. Leave the rest alone.

Hi Eirinn!

So nice to hear from you. Thank you for stopping by. How did the ice cream social turn out? How are things going with your other in-laws?

Thank you for the great advice, although I think I may have confused a few people - Oops. Actually, Sandi did reply, on page 3 of this thread. Hehe

I re-posted the TMs from my WAW Friday and my suggested response from Wonka so people wouldn't have to jump back and forth from my last thread. It was the same TM that V thought I should split it into 2 parts, and you helped me, too, by agreeing with Dear V. I didn't want to seem too anxious to reply, so I waited until today to reply to W.

I never sent the first part until late this afternoon-- a slightly modified version of Wonka's version. That's what I was still asking about today. I know...confusing! Sorry about that. Once I get around to gathering W's stuff and some boxes, I will reply with second part -- including Wonka's hilarious line "Knife?? Are you chasing bears in your backyard?? Ha!"

Thank you for all your support and checking in on me so often. I don't know what I'd do without your advice and cheerful support.

*hugs* *hugs* *hugs*

Bob

[Vanilla]

Sandi, Bob

I still think taking the higher ground is the right strategy. If you want to allow pause for invalidation then ignore it and act as if the apology was well meant.

Sandi I have added you to my daily votive and meditation together with your H and D.

WW still. Needs to work on her stuff.

Peace

V

[Bob723]

I still think taking the higher ground is the right strategy. If you want to allow pause for invalidation then ignore it and act as if the apology was well meant.

Dear V,

Thank you very much for stopping by and the good advice. You have been so helpful to me.

I want to reply to Dear Sandi next. Then, wait until you all see the TM I got from my WW at 1:40 AM today (Sunday Father's Day in the USA).

I hope you have a good day, V.

Peace!

Bob

[Bob723]

I've been kinda quiet in your threads of late, Bob. I'm not great at text-crafting, so I'll stay out of the way to let the experts work. Just wanted to hop in and say thanks for your continued support to me. I definitely appreciate it.

Have another manly fist bump.

Have a great Father's Day tomorrow!

Hi Matt,

I understand, of course, which is why I look to people like Wonka, Sandi, MrBond, Cadet, Vanilla, etc. to help with my texts.

A manly fist bump to you and have a great Father's Day today!

Bob

[Bob723]

Hello Dear Sandi,

I will be responding to your post in much detail soon.

I see you actually posted it while I was responding to Eirinn last night, but didn't see it until this morning - 9:10 AM Sunday by me now. ???

Your post made me feel validated, loved, appreciated and even brought a few tears of joy to me (your super-kind sentiments).

Be back soon...I promise.

*hugs*

Bob