I believe in the power of prayer, and I think you do, also. If it is not presumptuous of me, would you also add my H and D? I honestly know which will be passing away first. They are both going down in their physical problems at a fast rate.
Sorry for the HIJACK Bob.
Sandi this is horrible news and I am truly sorry to hear this. I don't know if I missed this somehow before, but I will do everything in my power to keep you and yours in my prayers and hope that others on the forum do the same. Their is true POWER in numbers I believe and if we all focus on it for you that should help!
I believe in the power of prayer, and I think you do, also. If it is not presumptuous of me, would you also add my H and D? I honestly know which will be passing away first. They are both going down in their physical problems at a fast rate.
Sorry for the HIJACK Bob.
Sandi this is horrible news and I am truly sorry to hear this. I don't know if I missed this somehow before, but I will do everything in my power to keep you and yours in my prayers and hope that others on the forum do the same. Their is true POWER in numbers I believe and if we all focus on it for you that should help!
(((((HUGS))))))
Dang...how did I miss this??!! Sandi, thinking of you, H, and D. Hope you guys can support each other through whatever it is you are experiencing at the moment.
Cadet and Wonka, you are so polite but, especially in a case like this, there is absolutely no reason to apologize for High-jacking” my thread. I do not think of it like that at all. When it comes to someone’s health on here, please feel free to post in my thread…especially if it’s someone like Sandi who does not have her own going, As you both know, she lovingly comes back here to help those of us most in need. Hey, just like both of you!
I hope all the Dads out there had a great Father’s Day. I sure did.
I had an IC appointment today. He read the 2 texts from my W last Friday AM (6/19) that were less than 10 minutes apart—the one where she admitted her previous text was “vicious” and then followed up with a favor to ask of me. After reading them, he looked up at me and said “Manipulative.” Just like me, Sandi and others’ thought. As I was talking with him, something popped into my tiny brain (He he). I have been seeing an IC for 8 months, take a mild anti-anxiety med, have read numerous self-help books including DB and DR, attended a Divorce Support Group for 15 weeks and what has my W done to work on herself?
I know I can’t control, nor do I want to, what she chooses to do or not do. The only thing W has mentioned about getting help for herself was right after New Year’s. W claimed she saw an IC my her Mom’s house 2 times and quit because the IC was “a weirdo.”
Even if W were to want to give us another try, how can we truly R if she doesn’t work on herself, too? Now, I admit, it’s certainly possible that she is seeing an IC now and chooses not to tell me. Fine. But her behavior is getting more and more manipulative which gives me cause for concern.
Me, the “King” of “take things one day at a time and keep a PMA” is very, very confused. Not because of anyone on the wonderful forum, but because of what I wrote above. I do understand that’s part of piecing, both working on ourselves, but my W is extremely stubborn (would admit this to you—please trust me).
I wonder if I have wasted 8 months of my life waiting for someone who blames me 100% for our troubles? I am physically and mentally exhausted.
Someone, please talk me off the “proverbial” ledge. Thank you.
I hope to check on my friends later.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I wanted to say what wonka said but wonks is so more eloquent than me so ^^ what wonka said.
Hang tough Bob.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
Hi Bob. I think everyone could see a level of manipulative behaviour from your W the issue is why. Is she looking after her own interests ( as we all do ) solely or is she seeing if you care or still are there for her. The answer is no one knows so Bob can only act as Bob sees fit.
You are a "good " guy Bob , you care for others and you love W. A 180 for Bob would be to ignore text , burn W's things and call her laughing hysterically !!!!!!!!
I'm no expert Bob and my opinion should be taken with that in mind.
Hi Bob. I think everyone could see a level of manipulative behaviour from your W the issue is why. Is she looking after her own interests ( as we all do ) solely or is she seeing if you care or still are there for her. The answer is no one knows so Bob can only act as Bob sees fit.
You are a "good " guy Bob , you care for others and you love W. A 180 for Bob would be to ignore text , burn W's things and call her laughing hysterically !!!!!!!!
I'm no expert Bob and my opinion should be taken with that in mind.
Take care. Rd
I know it's wrong but this made me laugh.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
So you think that the 8-months' time spent on self-improvement is a waste??! Is that right?
Wonka, great points! (Gee, I wonder how many times I’ve thought or written that about one of your posts.) No, not a waste of time on improving myself. Oops…I can see where it sounds like I am saying the entire time has been a waste. No way, many blessings have come out of it! One of the many has been working on improving myself. I meant that, until recently, I truly thought if my W noticed my changes should would reconsider things. Finally, it hit me—I’m having expectations, Bad Bob! So, thank you, Wonka, for asking that great question and the golden advice. You have talked me odd the "proverbial" ledge.
I’m sure I have posted this Bible verse in one of my threads some time ago and in someone else’s. I thought it would be helpful for others going through the pain of a divorce. Anytime a loved one is very sick, the caregiver(s) are going through scary, painful times, too.
Sandi, this verse is dedicated to you, your H and your D:
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’” (Jeremiah 29:11).
*hugs*
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
You guys are the best. Rd, you made me laugh, too! Boy, did I need that.
Please see my reply to Wonka above this post.
You are all so teriffic to me.
Wow, just, wow . . .
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
