I feel for you. My boys (the twins) are changing in front of my eyes. They're considering moving away to live with relatives for a while. I seriously don't blame them, but it is such a bitter pill. I'm losing my babies early because of Mr. Selfish. I am having a REALLY bad day today.
Judy. I hope that doesn't happen. My greatest comfort has been having all the kids around me. Sunday night dinner all 5 were home plus a girlfriend and now they are all sitting together watching a movie. Family is so important to them ( and me!) right now. Too bad that is not the case for WH I just think ... Where is he right now? Is he really "happy" being without his kids?
JPEG - one thing to take caution for is to try not to "recruit" your kids against your H in this. You can validate their feelings of rejection, but I don't know that it does you any good to bad-mouth him to them. He is still their father and their relationship with him is not yours to fix.
As for you, take some time to let this all sink in. Don't do anything today that you may regret for years. Let your emotions settle before you choose to really act on this.
JPEG - one thing to take caution for is to try not to "recruit" your kids against your H in this. You can validate their feelings of rejection, but I don't know that it does you any good to bad-mouth him to them. He is still their father and their relationship with him is not yours to fix.
This is something i was very conscience of since the beginning I havent been recruiting the kids against H if anything its been the other way around..This entire year that H has been gone I have been asking the kids to be patient with him etc Ihave been trying to set up times for them to get together for H to stay at house while i leave for weekend - after this happened last night I am backing off.
As for you, take some time to let this all sink in. Don't do anything today that you may regret for years. Let your emotions settle before you choose to really act on this.
Azzork I'm not sure what you mean when you say "choosing to really act on this"? Can you give a scenario
As for you, take some time to let this all sink in. Don't do anything today that you may regret for years. Let your emotions settle before you choose to really act on this.
Azzork I'm not sure what you mean when you say "choosing to really act on this"? Can you give a scenario
For example, filing for divorce, having a major argument with H, etc. etc.
My point is that I imagine your emotions re running high right now. Dont let them control how you react to this event.
Ohhhh I gotcha I have actually been pretty calm. I think cause finally he has been caught he cannot deny anymore He has been lying for years denying they were involved. Anyway he was very shaken up by being caught. And he has been waiting for me to show up and I don't know what.... Yell, cry, scream? I still don't feel the urge to respond in any way. I have gone dark and I am kind of enjoying it
Ok Need advice. Not so comfy in the dark anymore. I know H is waiting for confrontation. Think he wants it actually. OW is waiting for me to show up at work (they work together of course - could MLC story be any more typical?!?)
Ok Need advice. Not so comfy in the dark anymore. I know H is waiting for confrontation. Think he wants it actually. OW is waiting for me to show up at work (they work together of course - could MLC story be any more typical?!?)
Of course they want confrontation! The A feeds on drama. The more you push and oppose it, the stronger that their bond can become. Why give them the ammunition to grow closer together? I say keep out of it, and let them live their lives.
I'm so tired of being tired . I'm tired of being a martyr. I'm tired of "keeping quiet". I'm tired of hiding in my room. Im tired of being LB. I don't want to be a victim. I don't want to be bitter.
Understandable. Sleep can sometimes be tough to accomplish and maintain. Do the best you can. Have you tried any sleep aids?
Originally Posted By: Jpeg
I'm tired of being a martyr.
Martyr=a person who willingly suffers death rather than renounce his or her religion. I agree - that sounds tiring. So I think it's time to stop willingly suffering! What will you do for yourself TODAY to help break your cycle?
Originally Posted By: Jpeg
I'm tired of "keeping quiet".
What do you want to do? Tell everyone your H is having an affair? What good does that do for you? Tell people you trust if you need to, but keep the road home paved smoothly. I completely failed at this when I had the chance. Its not about "protecting" them, its about not promoting them.
Originally Posted By: Jpeg
I'm tired of hiding in my room.
So come out! Dont let this define your life and who you are!
Originally Posted By: Jpeg
Im tired of being LB.
Unfortunately, thats not our choice. But through this, we can all become better versions of ourselves that wont be left behind again.
Originally Posted By: Jpeg
I don't want to be a victim. I don't want to be bitter.
Have you watched the TED talk by Amy Huddy? I strongly believe that positivity breeds positivity. Thinking positive will yield positive results. Its time to put the bitterness aside and fake it until you make it.
