Michele Weiner-Davis @DivorceBusting Sep 28 People often think that marriage shouldn't take work.Those people often divorce. Good luck on finding a relationship that doesn't take work.
Michele Weiner-Davis @DivorceBusting Sep 29 We should always go the extra mile to insure that we are being kind, loving, caring, and empathetic to others. It makes all the difference!
Michele Weiner-Davis @DivorceBusting Sep 30 If you are fighting for your marriage, it helps to have a network of loving people around you to support your efforts. It's hard work!
Michele Weiner-Davis @DivorceBusting Oct 1 Well-meaning people may not understand your need to fight for your marriage Follow your heart. You know yourself best
Michele Weiner-Davis @DivorceBusting Oct 5 Openness and sharing = trust and closeness, making real sexual and emotional intimacy a possibility. Closeness and intimacy go hand in hand
Too many people think that children should be the first priority in a family. Here's the truth. The best thing you can do for your kids is to put marriage first. If you don't, there won't be a marriage, and that is NOT in the kids' best interest. Take time to nurture your marriage. Have sacred time carved out each week. Don't have excuses, just do it.
Michele Weiner-Davis @DivorceBusting Oct 6 Amazing how often couples don't need to find agreements to arguments, they just have to feel heard. Validation is the best solution. Hear me?
Part of what's wrong with our culture today is that we expect immediate gratification. We don't think we have to work at things anymore. Plus, we're obsessed with a "follow-your-blliss" attitude that makes the pursuit of personal goals tantamount to caring for others. Divorce flourishes in this cultural Petri dish. There are alternatives. Care about each other. Live by the stranger standard- where you treat your spouse half as cordially as you would a complete stranger. Invest in your marriage. Don't expect quick fixes when things go awry. Have patience. Have a heart. Don't chase the shiny object that will just lead you astray. Stay.
When you have problems in your marriage, people often tell you that you should get out, or that you shouldn't "put up with that crap." Then you begin to second guess yourself. Don't. If you fight for your marriage, regardless of the types or severity of your problems, it shows your integrity and your love for your marriage. You're not weak if you're willing to deal with less-than-optimal treatment from your spouse. You're simply working towards a better future. Hang in there.
This is great thread. Amazing how often the words are exactly what I need to hear
Edit - Yea Michelle does have a way with words! - Cadet
Last edited by Cadet; 10/12/1506:06 PM.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
Seven years ago today, my mom- in perfect health- got killed in a car accident. There isn't a day that I don't miss her. I was blessed with unconditional love in my life and for that gift, I am forever grateful. Life can turn on a dime. Don't take anything or anyone for granted. In the words of a well known song, "Shower the people you love with love. Show them the way that you feel." Life and love are precious. Michele Weiner-Davis
