Ha, tl2, well as you could still get that double entendre about the parentheses, make no mistake about it, you're still very much a man! Don't let anyone convince you otherwise!
I am so sorry about your hurt. Do you like hot chocolate? Sending hot chocolate your way.
That sense of rejection did come up in our R talks in the months leading to the D. He kept asking why I did what I did. And I tried explaining the fear and confusion that drove me to it. My mum was there during his outbursts and she's scarred by them as well.
But I can see his hurt. And when I reflected on my mini- MLC, I realised that he might have been wondering if I was unfaithful because of the way I was acting. So I get where you and he are coming from.
I feel that the OW helps him to get over his rejection and she's doing quite a good job at it. In fact, she may be doing or pretending to do such a good job that I don't think he has a reason to come back. He wants a carefree life and it seems the OW can offer him that.
He is very annoyed and uncomfortable around me, probably because of his guilt over the A as well.
And this is the best part, he is still angry with me because he says I get agitated. Well, well, Mr Pot doesn't realise that he's calling me black...
I don't know if he can get over his anger and his issues, because it's still all about me. And his family thinks it's all my fault too.
I used to think that it was all a matter of miscommunication and misplaced expectations. And I tried so hard for a second chance. But now I am so tired. There really is no point going back to what we left behind because it just didn't work and definitely won't work the second time round. He needs to know that life is real and gets messy. And it's not personal, it's just messy in different ways for everyone.
But yes, I will work hard on the casually sociable part. In the meantime, I will also have to work on my own sense of rejection. If I manage to smile at him, I will broadcast it on banners here.
Last edited by Grlonfr; 12/13/1503:34 AM.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
I feel the same way as you, Gmum. I have always wanted kid to have siblings, but have always held back because I didn't think the X could cope. And now the thought that kid may have step-siblings from the OW just f@@@$ big time.
Yes, all these years of life packed into boxes. Just makes you feel so uprooted, doesn't it?
Gmum, is it possible to get your H to ship them to wherever your going? Or is there a way for you to stay in the US? Will your L help you with that?
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
Pho, I watched the whole series and I love Katniss for being such a kick- ass woman. And I loved the song as well.
(Spoiler alert)
But the good news is that Peeta eventually came around, didn't he? And he was the one who really loved Katniss. That happy ending made me bawl. And those 2 little kids at the end, don't even get me started on them.
Last edited by Grlonfr; 12/13/1503:49 AM.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
I think my body is finally breaking down from the stress.
The weight loss, the hair loss, the dry and blistering lips. And now this itchy scaly patch behind the knees. Nothing like these to make me feel so attractive.
Will have to see a derm asap. Upcoming lunch with ex-fil is putting me on the edge. What is it? Tell me already!
Yes, impatience. Still working on not stomping my feet in frustration when things are not up to speed. As someone much younger once told me, 'Just chillax!'
Catching a horror movie with some gf later. Love horror movies! Yay! Problem is that my car may not be around when the X drops kid off.
So what is he going to do this time round? See more of the OW? Oh wait, he's already doing this. More last minute changes of plans? But to quote tl2, NMYNMM.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
I don't know if he can get over his anger and his issues, because it's still all about me. And his family thinks it's all my fault too.
As a mostly recovered 'anger addict' for a few years now, I can tell you that he will never get over the anger/issues until he realizes it's really all about himself. Because it is.
Best you can do is take good care of yourself and be there for the kid. Remember...he is not your sun and your life and well-being do not revolve around him. I think you're more OK than it sometimes feels to you.
I'm sending love, I know exactly how you feel. The thing is- maybe right now the ow is giving him his carefree life, but that can't and won't last.. He will be shattered out of that bubble, and $h*ts gonna get real.
Then what do they do?? I'm so angry with h today I can't stand to be in the same room, so my db-ing isn't going well.
Me 26 H 25 M 4 T 5 Baby born 4/14 BD: 1/15 EA: 2/15 PA: 4/15 reconciling: 4/15 ILYBINILWY- 11/15 ILY-1/16 ILYBNILWY 4/16 ILY 6/16 ILYBINILWY 6/16 Baby due 3/17 BD 8/16
As a mostly recovered 'anger addict' for a few years now, I can tell you that he will never get over the anger/issues until he realizes it's really all about himself. Because it is.
I realised that the 2nd outburst happened because we have never resolved the issues from his 1st outburst. We tried MC for a few times, couldnt find a C that we both liked, and I gave up and decided to just plod along.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
