One never can fill in those blanks, huh? We'd have to be in the room with them, or better yet, in their heads.
It could be that the friend's wife see's her husband as being fatherly to your W or see's that the R is making her H happy and she wants him to be happy. She also may not see, or chooses to ignore the inappropriateness.
My H went on a ski trip last year (before bomb drop) and this year (after). I'm not in Bubble's husband's head, but I have no idea what he thought. He saw me and was friendly on this year's trip (I was with a different group, but ran into him, her and H skiing), but I, too, wonder what he thinks of having my H as a third wheel. An uncle to his kids. AND if he knows how much alone time they had.
When I confronted him about basically spending a weekend with her a few years ago, and lying about part of it, he pretty much said 'what do you want me to do, fire her? She works hard for me." In the ensuing months, I caved and just "forgave" him but not really. And he carried on, even blatantly choosing her company over mine. Left me at a table for a half hour at a nice restaurant to talk to her on the phone just outside our window. I'm not that wimpy woman anymore that had such low esteem that I put up with it after crying about it.
But even if your W is just very involved with a daddy-figure or having an ea, if you are uncomfortable and she knows it, it's wrong. She has made a choice. I think in your case, though, sticking to DB methods might actually help quite a bit. You grow out of "daddy" time. It might just be her way of working through her issues. I will read through your thread tonight and think on it.
M-51 H-54 2D-27 and 25 M-26 yrs Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15 He moved out 10-3-15 D filed 1-27-16 D final 10-27-16
I no longer have any doubt that it's an EA. I questioned myself for a long time (for a variety of reasons), but I no longer question it. However, it still blows my mind that his wife almost seems to push the two of them together; I'll never understand that.
There's a much longer story behind all of it, but ultimately I'm unable to be a third wheel in the marriage.
Yeah, me neither. As I said, we really don't get to know another person's perspective unless they tell us. Who knows what the wife thinks she's accomplishing by pushing them together. If she really is pushing on purpose, she obviously has a reason. Does she believe they are having an EA?
M-51 H-54 2D-27 and 25 M-26 yrs Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15 He moved out 10-3-15 D filed 1-27-16 D final 10-27-16
