Just click on Steve’s name there on the left. When a windows pops up select “show forum posts”. Then go to the upper right and select “threads created”. There you have Steve’s own sitch posts by date. Go for the first one.
Remember that you need to be logged in to do that.
WW H(me): 53 W: 48 T: 27 M: 22 S: 18 Piecing since 03/2016 Saw the light in the storm
Just click on Steve’s name there on the left. When a windows pops up select “show forum posts”. Then go to the upper right and select “threads created”. There you have Steve’s own sitch posts by date. Go for the first one.
Remember that you need to be logged in to do that.
Thanks Nef!
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
Well W took son to a bday party. Earlier in the week she said that while he's there, we could 'talk'. No mention of that or anything else this morning. I'm thinking I should go and do something for a few hours (don't know if she's staying there or just dropping him off), but obviously the last time I did something she blew a gasket.
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
Absolutely do something, but maybe stick around the house or be available since you said you would talk during this time. Do not initiate the talk. Do not get sucked in when she "temp-checks" you. She may do this to see if you are still on the hook.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
Absolutely do something, but maybe stick around the house or be available since you said you would talk during this time. Do not initiate the talk. Do not get sucked in when she "temp-checks" you. She may do this to see if you are still on the hook.
Thx. I just went downstairs for an hour banging out some tunes on the guitar. That always helps. W just texted and said she's staying at the party. I may go to the local bar/restaurant and get lunch
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
See, she flaked out anyways. So don't get mad at her, even though you're right to be mad when someone doesn't keep their word. Just drop the expectations that she'll do what she says.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
See, she flaked out anyways. So don't get mad at her, even though you're right to be mad when someone doesn't keep their word. Just drop the expectations that she'll do what she says.
No, I'm not mad in the least. We didn't have definitive plans to talk, and since we had it out Thursday night, I wasn't expecting anything today. Plus, my son's a little shy, so i knew there was a strong chance that he wouldn't want her to leave the party.
One very troubling thing she mentioned Thursday night that I've been thinking about. When she mentioned buying those concert tickets, she made a point to hint to me that she has ran up a ton of credit card debt. She has her own cards and I have my own. Like an idiot, I've never paid much attention to her spending. She didn't say how high they were, but said when I was talking about keeping our individual debts if we divorce, she has no idea how she'd afford to live because of all her debt. Should I bring this up again sometime soon???
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
Are her credit cards getting paid off out of a joint account? You need to have a serious discussion about separating your finances in order to protect yourself. I would get on that ASAP. My W was spending 1k a month on a credit card that drew on our joint account while we were first separated. I didn't want to see that, nor did I want to control her. Having a serious talk about how we were going to function going forward was important and healthy. If your W is running up serious debt, you need to take care of it ASAP. I am no expert on finances (Vanilla is really good), but you can check out my older thread as lots of people gave me very good advice.
W 34 Me 42 Married 7 years together 8 0 kids 1 beloved dog BD 4/6/2018 I moved out 4/7/2018 I moved back in alone 8/05/2018 I file 3/06/2019 D official 5/7/2019
