Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 4 of 11 1 2 3 4 5 6 10 11
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
These words work good: "I am sorry you feel that way"

use them when appropriate.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 619
K
kech Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 619
I didn’t respond. I figured “if you don’t know what to say, say nothing”.

I’m extremely upset he started paperwork. I didn’t feel like he had once we saw each other, so to hear he did, wow. What do you think of all the texts he’s sending? Anything?

I will see him again tomorrow. I’m dreading it at this point. Every time we see each other is another chance for him to give me paperwork and expect us to be closer to divorce. He knows he’s killing me. All his texts confuse me though.

I don’t know. I’m broken. I’m also better than how he’s treating me. I will be going out tomorrow night and plan to look my absolute best. I don’t think it changes anything for him of course, he’s seen me at my best. But I also can’t believe he asked me what time I will be home. After all these nights he’s not coming home until 2am and he has the nerve to ask me when I’ll be home so he can figure out where he will sleep? That’s BS and he knows it.

Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
Originally Posted by kech
Those were all his texts, and I did not respond.
Good girl. That is the right thing to do.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
Originally Posted by kech
I didn’t respond. I figured “if you don’t know what to say, say nothing”.
yes. Keep all convo about parenting.

Quote
What do you think of all the texts he’s sending? Anything?
He is temperature checking. New you will not bite.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310

Quote
I will be going out tomorrow night and plan to look my absolute best. I don’t think it changes anything for him of course, he’s seen me at my best.
Go girl! Show him confident, sexy you! Enjoy your time out.

One thing I would caution you on is drinking. I recommend staying sober through this whole process.


Quote
But I also can’t believe he asked me what time I will be home.
You need to discuss and negotiate exchanges with the baby.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
Anything else I can help with tonight?


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 619
K
kech Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 619
When you say “temperate checking”, do you think he has really started applying for divorce? I don’t think he would lie about it but gosh I’d love if he didn’t really do it.

Just sending so many texts, and I do know him so well. I know he wants my reaction and he wants me to want to discuss it. But I’m too heartbroken to discuss it. If he’s wanting a divorce that’s so upsetting to me. He has to know that.

I have already told myself I cannot drink tomorrow night. I have to be on my complete A game with this and always have control over myself. I know I won’t if I drink so I will not be drinking. I told him also I would be home by midnight. I am not offering for him to stay here, which I’m sure he expected me to do.

I need to 180 on a lot. This is where he pulls me into these heartfelt discussions, as he’s breaking my heart with the worst news ever. I have always given in and had the discussions with him. Trying to learn.

I hope D is not the end for us. Even if he files I do hope to still have time. What an awful night.

Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310

He is a liar, a manipulator and a cheater. Do not believe anything he says. Lets bust this divorce.


The only one that you can control is you. H is gone for now. We fix him later.

We work on how you interact with H. You get healthy first. After that the relationship is FORCED to change, for the better.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 619
K
kech Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 619
Ready2change,

That was by far the most motivating message to date. I need to read that over and over.

I have a LOT to learn on how to interact with him. It is very hard for me to not to just pretend like everything’s okay with us everytime I am around him. I hate feeling like I’m making things weird so I end up just trying to act like all is well. I need to learn to detach.

I hope this divorce can be busted SO BAD. For now I will really try to focus on me. I’m nervous about every interaction with him. I need to handle this correctly

Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,349
Likes: 310
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
The only one that you can control is you. H is gone for now. He is a liar, a manipulator and a cheater. Do not believe anything he says. We fix him later.

We work on how you interact with H. You get healthy first. After that the relationship is FORCED to change, for the better.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Page 4 of 11 1 2 3 4 5 6 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard