R2C is dead right on this. He is trying to control you with the lawn mowing.
You could even do this:
When he shows up, have the baby ready to go. Tell him you have to run out, you are taking her with you. You will have her back when he is finished mowing the lawn.
If it takes a 1/2 hour to mow the lawn, come back in a 1/2 hour, drop her off, and then "something came up, I have to go. I'll be back by bedtime."
Oh, and look smoking hot in all cases.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
R2C is dead right on this. He is trying to control you with the lawn mowing.
You could even do this:
When he shows up, have the baby ready to go. Tell him you have to run out, you are taking her with you. You will have her back when he is finished mowing the lawn.
If it takes a 1/2 hour to mow the lawn, come back in a 1/2 hour, drop her off, and then "something came up, I have to go. I'll be back by bedtime."
Oh, and look smoking hot in all cases.
^^^^^^ This is how you DB^^^^^^^
1) Assess a situation 2) Assess your options 3) Weigh the consequences of each option 4) Make a decision 5) Execute that decision 6) Live with the consequences of that decision (good OR bad) 7) Go back to step 1
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Ok so I was driving my normal long route, so that I don’t drive by the bars, and he just happened to drive past me. He texted me right after, because I’m sure he saw me, and said he was on his way to mow Lawn.
I didn’t respond for a while and then I did saying “ok”. So I’m thinking now I just won’t go home for another hour or so until he is done and I will just drop baby off to him and leave again. Does this work?
Ooorrrrrr, you could hire some hot younger guy to mow the law, preferably shirtless, and have him arrive about 20 min before WH. So when he shows up, you can just shoo him away (baby on hip & beer in other hand, while you watch your new help) and casually say to WH, without looking up,"I think we're good here. See ya tomorrow, ok?"
LOL. ;-))) Kidding. Sort of.
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
Ooorrrrrr, you could hire some hot younger guy to mow the law, preferably shirtless, and have him arrive about 20 min before WH. So when he shows up....
I was thinking the same thing!
Seduction is awful fun if you let it.....
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
"I'm really sorry you feel that way. I certainly hear you, and that this is what you want. It's not what I want, however, and I think we owe it to our daughter to not just cut and run here because one of us suddenly wants out of the marriage."
There will come a time that statement will be helpful .....
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
I like to figure out the worst possible scenario (outcome), and then visualize myself handling it confidently, and strongly. Once you face down your worst fears, you find you're very well prepared to deal with the medium-sized ones, because it almost always turns out to be better than the worst-case scenario you came up with.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
If it helps anyone out there, my spouse literally told me that it was when I really pulled away from her, and she had to face the prospect of life without me, that she really turned around. The same story over and over again with Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Yes, R2R, it's good to have a line memorized, so when WH brings up some BS projection, she can calmly and confidently remind him this was his choice. The poster Starsky used to have the best one liners (or several lines).
The jealousy thing is sort of silly and can distract from the important work of 180s, GAL and detachment. So I know I should be careful when I make posts like that. However, I will add, in my sitch, it drove my H nuts when he thought about what I was doing and if I was dating. There was one night when he had the kids and got an alert at 3 am on his phone that my (our home) front door had open and shut (he had set up our home alarm that way in the past). He was stressing out wondering why. The reality was I had been at a girlfriends house late, took a nap on her couch because I had a few drinks, and that's when I got home. Of course he never knew any of that or asked. But when things like this came up, or I looked nice and was going out, or was making new friends, he felt me slipping away. He was losing me as plan B. This also forced him out of his foggy wayward mindset and showed him his own double standards! It was like a forced mirror in his face. "I am having an A. I left my W for OW. Who am I to worry about what my W is doing!?!" That drove him nuts too. :-)))
So I am not saying you should play games or try and make him jealous intentionally. That was a joke. I am just letting you know that as you find your own way, become confident and awesome, you will simultaneous start to detach. No one can tell you what your H will do or what will happen with him and OW, but in time, it is likely he will notice your changes and be forced to think about it. Plus you are the W and the mother of his child. Hand's down, there is no match, you win. He gets to be the fool that left.
Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
