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OrangeK Offline OP
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I did not reply beyond what I typed above. I also don't believe for a second that she texted me on accident. That was 100% intentional. Temp check if I ever heard of one, she was waiting to see if I would jump on the opportunity to say I miss you too. yet again, for someone that apparently wants nothing to do with me she can't seem to leave me alone for longer than 2 weeks. Crazy sauce.


M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
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2 Major breakups.
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Agree with you: neat temp check.


WW H(me): 53
W: 48
T: 27 M: 22
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OrangeK Offline OP
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Yea, but why? If im so awful and loathesome?
She started talking about s3 and was being very friendly and chatty, i think she was bored and lonely. Had no attention. OM works 3rd ahift and this was at 11pm.


M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
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2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD
2 Major breakups.
2 Rebounds
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OK, it happens. My sister left her husband after years of him being a deadbeat, freeloading loser. They had my niece together, but finally after 5 years my sister had had enough. She filed for D. She met a new guy (her now husband). He was the exact opposite. He was a degreed, successful, determined, and motivated guy.

Just before my sister's D was final she called my mom. She said she was meeting her STBXH at my mom's house. My mom was very confused. My sister admitted she was having cold feet, and was considering reconciling (something the STBXH was for), calling off the D, and obviously, dumping the new guy.

After meeting with her loser STBXH her decision was confirmed and she went through with the D and eventually married the new guy.

THAT was with a LBS that was getting what he deserved. So you can imagine, that a decent guy like yourself would effect a similar last minute regret in your STBXW. They deal with things getting real too. If she has any normal, logical thinking way down deep at all she will have a pang or two of "am I really doing the right (for her, not morally) thing?"

I agree with others, it would have been better if you just ignored it. She threw the worm out there, and you got hooked.

Last edited by Steve85; 09/27/18 02:49 PM.

M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
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OrangeK Offline OP
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How is it that I got hooked if my response was no big deal don't worry about it?


M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
-----------------------------------------------------
2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD
2 Major breakups.
2 Rebounds
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
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Originally Posted by OrangeK
How is it that I got hooked if my response was no big deal don't worry about it?


You responded. Then sent an unsolicited picture.

I am not here to argue with you, I am telling you how it came across.


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OrangeK Offline OP
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Not trying to argue. I sent the picture to change the subject and end the convo. It worked.
Next time she does that ill just ghost it.


M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
-----------------------------------------------------
2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD
2 Major breakups.
2 Rebounds
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 1,669
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OrangeK Offline OP
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Well. Im about done divorce. Im happily Dating, S3 is worlds better, as am I. I have healing left to do, but its nothing i cant handle. Thanks yall. Stay strong!!!

Orange out.


M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
-----------------------------------------------------
2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD
2 Major breakups.
2 Rebounds
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 1,669
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OrangeK Offline OP
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Full silence since "i miss you" text.
I have consulted some diagnosed NPD people about this, and the likelyhood of a manipulative temp check is about 99%.

All is well with S3, hes doing great.
No word from court regarding final divorce since hearing on Sept. 11th.

No news is good news?


M: 35, EX-W: 3, S:4
All Divorce Proceedings Complete - Oct 18
-----------------------------------------------------
2nd EX - Was Engaged - Diagnosed BPD
2 Major breakups.
2 Rebounds
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Well, I'm sure you weren't expecting her to switch into pursuit mode. I think you're doing so much better Orange.

Good to hear about your son doing well.

So now she is not pushing the divorce, is that right? Or what is holding that up?


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
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