We’re going to talk more I imagine about our sitch. But I am losing my self-respect by basically having her cake eat.
I don’t deserve this. And if she doesn’t know, I will tell her. Again and again and again.
I eventually got to that point too. It did finally trigger the D filing, but i know that ww was going to do it all along. She was stringing me and our family along as far as possible while she was cake eating.
No, we dont deserve it and our children dont either. My ww is pathetic for what shes done, and doesnt deserve me and yours doesnt deserve you either. Sorry, i had a trigger (very bad trigger) and i hate my ww so much right now.
Last edited by equalzr; 10/21/1812:13 AM.
Together:20 years M:3 years Me:40 WW:40 S15 A suspected:5/17 AC:5/18 BD:8/18 WW in full blown R w/ OM Still under same roof
Thing is, I don't think W would file for D. I think she is fine with things being the way they are right now. I really do not know what is going on in her mind, but I cannot be abrasive about it. I am the better man. It's what I have been working so hard on lately and I refuse to step back.
WW/WAW don't care about S feelings, yes? They are going to cake eat. But W is going about other parts of her business now as it was pre-BD.
I hope the conversation comes sooner than later. This needs to be communicated.
Thing is, I don't think W would file for D. I think she is fine with things being the way they are right now. I really do not know what is going on in her mind, but I cannot be abrasive about it. I am the better man. It's what I have been working so hard on lately and I refuse to step back.
WW/WAW don't care about S feelings, yes? They are going to cake eat. But W is going about other parts of her business now as it was pre-BD.
I hope the conversation comes sooner than later. This needs to be communicated.
R2C/AS/ovrrnbw/Steve, what are your thoughts?
hi pain. am sorry about what you’re going through right now. stay strong.
likewise with my WW. she doesn’t want to file D. according to her friend, it’s too much hassle.meanwile D14 is suffering the embarrassment of what her mother is doing. D14 doesn’t want to hangout with WW’s friends, they’re good people and worried about D14’s well being. They even offered to take him at nights when i work but D14 refuses.
You are right. we are the better and rational ones in this debacle. we need to be steadfast and strong specially for the kids sake. WW doesn’t care about me, I don’t care about her either. just another cashier at walmart.
But how long do we put up with this? Do I just chalk this as a hiccup and continue to DB as usual with the added goal of R? I mean, when I told W that I need closure on this and want the pain to stop, she was expectedly neutral. She said that I fixate on these things when I have a bad week (which I obviously did by my past week post history) and told me that the conversation will be brought up while she and I think about this.
Should I continue my plans of the photo shoot? The 15 minute lunch hangout? I knew that her being involved with OM was still possible. I just hoped that it was not.
I just really feel like I messed up by exposing more of myself and my wish to have this end. But I also am happy that I set and reinforced (calmly) a boundary that I thought I established. Whether D4 is telling the truth or not, I don't know. But I am not acting in the same angry manner as I was before. That has to account for something. I still feel like I am becoming a better man. I just do not want to succumb to the pain that precedes it.
But how long do we put up with this? Do I just chalk this as a hiccup and continue to DB as usual with the added goal of R? I mean, when I told W that I need closure on this and want the pain to stop, she was expectedly neutral. She said that I fixate on these things when I have a bad week (which I obviously did by my past week post history) and told me that the conversation will be brought up while she and I think about this.
Should I continue my plans of the photo shoot? The 15 minute lunch hangout? I knew that her being involved with OM was still possible. I just hoped that it was not.
I just really feel like I messed up by exposing more of myself and my wish to have this end. But I also am happy that I set and reinforced (calmly) a boundary that I thought I established. Whether D4 is telling the truth or not, I don't know. But I am not acting in the same angry manner as I was before. That has to account for something. I still feel like I am becoming a better man. I just do not want to succumb to the pain that precedes it.
this might help you see it in a different point of view..
Calling it. W feels like she can date others since I failed. She stated that the romance was over and I foolishly had hope. You were right Steve, Gordie. You were right. I did not tell her how I found out this information of her activities, but it broke me. I really wanted to save M. But it was already a lost cause.
I am back to square one. And this time, the destination is different.
Calling it. W feels like she can date others since I failed. She stated that the romance was over and I foolishly had hope. You were right Steve, Gordie. You were right. I did not tell her how I found out this information of her activities, but it broke me. I really wanted to save M. But it was already a lost cause.
I am back to square one. And this time, the destination is different.
I’m broken.
Hang in there pain. At least you know what direction you want to go. I was at this same crossroad, and like they say you have to let go. Realizing your old MR is dead is one of the toughest things you'll ever go through, but it's a part of the process. It's time to put the focus on you. Detach and build a better version of yourself, and do it for you.
Together:20 years M:3 years Me:40 WW:40 S15 A suspected:5/17 AC:5/18 BD:8/18 WW in full blown R w/ OM Still under same roof
I’m struggling so much. No sleep again. Told W that she shattered me. She had the audacity to tell me “there is nothing wrong with being single.” I told her that she is not allowed to tell me how it feels. She has no right. More of the same “I need support from you too.” And I cannot do it. I told her that we are partners for D4 sake. That’s it.
I’m done couch surfing. And I’m going to talk about separating finances, phone plans, and possibly have her move out. She wants the WW lifestyle, she can finance it herself.
Shattered. Hopeless. Unattractive. That’s sums up my feelings. I hate this and I hate myself and I have no other option but to keep on simply because of D4.
