Just had a back and forth with W. She told me she missed D4 and wants to spend more time with her. I told her I am the same. I have two evenings and one full weekend day. W told me to stay at the house then, which I was doing anyway.
Then she said we are going to have to do D4 scheduling for "the rest of forever".
More back and forth. Talked about going on a trial run of her leaving the house. I told her she can do what she needs to do. She asked if won't we have to eventually make a permanent decision? I told her that I am not thinking that far ahead. She said (likely in frustration) that it is ultimately about my comfort. I told her my comfort has nothing to do with this. I told her that she said she needed space and time to mourn. How she get it is up to her. She ended it by saying that I can have my space but she and D4 need it as well.
She says she needs it to be able to breathe and mourn. Whatever that means. I apparently am still not detached but it's getting slightly easier day by day.
Too much convo going on. Pull back. Give her time and space. Keep your responses brief. When she says stuff like "it is ultimately about your comfort" then don't reply. Respond briefly to questions. You need to go dim to center yourself.
AS, was the conversation we just had a major temp check that I failed? I mean I saw some signs and tried not to take the bait, but obviously I have more work to do.
I am a little confused. You both are in the house basically doing an in-house separation that almost sounds like an in-house divorce. Do you have a scheduled child plan?
H(37) W(35) D8, D5, S3 T20, M13 BD 8/31/18 EA Discovered 9/13/18 Mediation 10/3/18 W files for D 10/12/18 W moves out 11/10/18 EA confirmed 12/25/18 D Final 1/10/19
I am a little confused. You both are in the house basically doing an in-house separation that almost sounds like an in-house divorce. Do you have a scheduled child plan?
It stated as a trial in-house S that morphed three months later to a in-house S (while W is in an EA/PA with OM), and it was a 3-day W stay, 3-day I stay at the house S. This has been going on for over 10 months now with no end in sight.
W is starting talks of moving out, but she is very hesitant.
I just know that I am past the point of discomfort in her presence. I am past the point of mourning. She feels like she needs to breathe and mourn. She wants to leave, she can go.
