Sorry Harvey. I have regrets too but I know that I did my best with what I knew at the time. Hindsight is always 20/20. All you can do it learn from it and resolve to do better next time. A D is the dissolution of the marriage that was. You never know what the future holds. Take time to heal.Get to know you again. Love your girls. Be a great dad and treat yourself well. (((Harvey)))
Abso-f*ing-lutely! My life is going to be great. I am blessed. My girls are a blessing. My family and friends are blessing. My job is a blessing. Outside of the fact that my W didn't believe in me enough to give me a second chance, I have an amazing life. I refuse to let the D define me. What I do from here on out will define me.
I had a good time hanging out with relatives for the early part of the day. I bought a new Christmas tree this afternoon, put it up, and added candy canes. It's quite a bit smaller than the 12" behemoth we had before. We got the bigger tree from MIL. It didn't feel like my tree anymore. I'll be starting my vegetable soup recipe shortly. It's hard to believe that I'm 16 hours away from my marriage being officially over. Obviously, I'm sad. I'm trying to keep busy, so that I don't think about it too much. I found a new trick that has helped me. Whenever I find myself thinking of W or our marriage, I tell myself "squirrel". It's my key to think about something else. It's surprisingly effective.
A huge rush of sadness has fallen on me. I will be divorced in 12 hours. My heart aches. I talked to D12 tonight. She is doing much better. I'm thankful for that, but I'm also sad that apparently I'm the only one who is feeling such intense sorrow. One of those times where I just want to cry. My vegetable soup turned out well, and I kept my mind busy by calling my Mom and working out. Saying "squirrel" is not going to work tonight though. The moment of truth is upon me. I will have to begin the next chapter of my life starting tomorrow.
My cousin and her husband cannot understand how my W could give up such a great guy. (I'm sure everybody hears that from their loved ones.) They said that they would not be surprised if my W eventually regrets her decision and looks to reconcile. It sort of makes me feel some distant hope, but the likelihood of that happening is probably minimal. By the time my W feels any kind of regret, I may have moved on. It's a constant struggle to wonder if I should keep hope for our R or if it's healthier for me to completely move on. Other moments I think that I deserve somebody more loyal, that maybe there's a better fit for me--but I know deep down that I love my W too much to pretend that I'm not lost right now.
I must continue GAL'ing as much as possible. I must make the 180s permanent. I must completely detach.
Tomorrow, I'm staying overnight at my cousin's house. Saturday, her husband and I are going to an ice fishing show. What an old man thing to do, but I'm looking forward to it. Afterwards, we'll hit a couple of new brew pubs. I really enjoy spending time with them, and they have given me great support during this season of my life.
Harvey, are you in MN?
M: 34 W:34 D:7 D:6 S:3
M: 9.5 years T: 12
OM found & BD (by me): 9/19/18 IHS begins W informs me she's moving out: 11/28/18 W files: 12/21/18 D Final: 2/25/19
Tomorrow, I'm staying overnight at my cousin's house. Saturday, her husband and I are going to an ice fishing show. What an old man thing to do, but I'm looking forward to it. Afterwards, we'll hit a couple of new brew pubs. I really enjoy spending time with them, and they have given me great support during this season of my life.
Tomorrow, I'm staying overnight at my cousin's house. Saturday, her husband and I are going to an ice fishing show. What an old man thing to do, but I'm looking forward to it. Afterwards, we'll hit a couple of new brew pubs. I really enjoy spending time with them, and they have given me great support during this season of my life.
Harvey, are you in MN?
Yes, are you?
Next door. I was at the ice fishing show too!
M: 34 W:34 D:7 D:6 S:3
M: 9.5 years T: 12
OM found & BD (by me): 9/19/18 IHS begins W informs me she's moving out: 11/28/18 W files: 12/21/18 D Final: 2/25/19
I know some people have scolded me for working on my online dating profile, but I needed to do something to keep my mind off what is going on. Again, I will not make this public until next summer (as I don't even live in the city that I'll be settling in until then).
Is this version better?
Quote
Hello!
What a crazy journey life is. Cherish and appreciate every moment--the highs, the lows, and the mundane.
It's cliche to say I love to travel, but I do. My job allows me to indulge in my love for travel. Lying on a beach on the Carolina shore, going on a safari in Kenya, and hiking in Glacier National Park have been three of my favorites so far, but I have a lot more places to see.
I'm an outdoorsy type. Camping, hiking, fishing, hunting; it doesn't matter. Some of my favorite evenings have been spent sitting by the warmth of a campfire in the Badlands as the Northern Lights flicker in the distance.
I love hanging out with friends or a good concert, game, or play, but I equally love quiet nights at home. I don't need to be on the go all of the time.
My faith is very important to me. I am blessed to be a blessing to others.
I'm a single Dad who has joint custody of two wonderful daughters. My daughters are my world, but there is room in my world for a fun-loving, adventurous, faith-filled partner who finds beauty in the simple joy of casting a line, spending a weekend binge-watching a new series, hanging out with friends, or traveling to exotic places.
Tomorrow, I'm staying overnight at my cousin's house. Saturday, her husband and I are going to an ice fishing show. What an old man thing to do, but I'm looking forward to it. Afterwards, we'll hit a couple of new brew pubs. I really enjoy spending time with them, and they have given me great support during this season of my life.
