Not much since I am still discovering these feelings, what they mean, etc. One of my big fears was that I was becoming wayward. I have been open about how I 5-7 years ago I was pretty open to the idea of an affair. Almost went down that road. Some of those old feelings were returning. YOu know, the grass is greener feelings. Luckily I controlled those, voiced them here, and got the support and 2x4s I was looking for! Now I am back to the self-discovery phase. Reading, studying, and understanding. Can't share outside sources here but I have found some great books related to my feelings. And they have been very helpful.
As I read this, it makes me wonder if YOU were ready for such a quick turnaround.
Whether or not you really wanted this..
Were ready if it did happen.
You have had 2 start and stops in the past few years that have turned around quickly.
And I wonder if either of you really put the "work" in, to understand what being in a relationship really, deeply means.
To some extent, I saw you start it, however...
Just when your "good stuff" was beginning to happen, here she is again, wanting a relationship that she really has no idea how to facilitate.
You were shell shocked both times and were just beginning to find out who you were without all of the clutter (at least this time) when she started pursuing you.
So here you were, willing to accept what she was asking because it seemed right in the moment. It didn't cause you to change much except your 180's and little things that didn't "rock your world" relationship wise.
You were willing to sell yourself, just be able to say that you were still married...
When a person goes through a situation like this, they grow in areas that are light years ahead of the WAS when they return.
With you ??
I almost feel that is was work interrupted...maybe twice, if you went through this process the first time...
If I were to ask you what "love" meant to you, what would your answer be ???
If I were to ask you what you the difference is between "love" and "obligation" was, what would you say ???
If I were to ask you what reconciliation looked like, what would your answer be ???
If I were to ask you how will you know when you get there ??
How do you stay there ??
If I were to ask you, what defines Steve as a man , what would you say ??
And I know the standard internet versions of the answers. I want your answer, what you want, need, seek that is relevant to your thoughts , goals, morals....
What you want to teach your daughter....
Cause if you don't know the answers to the hard questions, you will never get through the "find out why" phase....
Mach1, can't respond to all of this but good stuff and I will respond.
Originally Posted by Mach1
Quote
I don't remember this, can you refresh my memory?
Thread #6
On 7-20
I am on no social media. At all. Hate the stuff.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Please start a new thread and link the two threads together. Thanks!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
