I am so happy that everything turned out okay. The day sounded simply amazing!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thank you! ANd for the hug, Andrew. I think it couldn't have gone better, personally. He's son is so stinkin cute. I can see myself falling in love with him too. For sure. Yesterday D 11 and I went to yoga class together and we were by M's house so we went to pick up baby gates for my evil dog to keep him out of the kitchen. His son was being really talkative with me, so maybe he likes me a little, lol. M was explaining to D11 how to put the gates together. We were only there 10 minutes. I have to admit, it is nice to not have to hide around the kids. A little more freedom should be good.
ON the topic of this dog. I may be the most evil person, I love the dog, but I wouldn't have done this over again. I am not sleeping, he is so destructive, I am surprised he hasn't killed himself yet. I don't get sleep. I was up at 5am this morning, after he woke me up 2 other times. I can't go anywhere, I have zero freedom. I can't just go to my cousins house for dinner after work tonight (she lvies around the corner from my work) I have ot go home play with the dog, etc. I have no one to watch the dog when I go away to my dad's for the weekend. I am pricing out dg walkers and sitters and holy crap. I can't afford all of this on top of everything else.
I made a mistake. I feel awful saying it, but I did.
I also decided to stop the gym for a while a because I can't keep up with my life and D11 needs more attention, activities herself, etc. I can go on the weekend and maybe one night a week, but my gym isn't open except for 9am class on Saturday on the weekend. I decnided to do one yoga class with D11 a week. ANd maybe something else. I need ot go easier on my body than crossfit for a while anyways. I love it there, but I can simply not do it all anymore.
Life is a bunch of sacrifices. The gym I need to sacrifice for now, even though it's like my only hobby. My daughter needs me. She needs activities, she needs me to be home and present after work. I am the only one here. And she is always here. So, maybe when I am ready to go back, I can see if I can make myself prepared to do the 5:30am class. But I need my time back after work these days.
That's all. Just figuring out stuff as I go along.
Last edited by job; 02/18/1912:00 PM. Reason: added space between paragraphs
I have had two dogs for the last 15 years although one died about 4 months ago. It will never happen again. They are expensive, destructive, and are essentially like little kids. Truthfully I would rather have a cat!
Sounds like things are going well G. Just remember to make time for yourself.
Time for myself I am not doing right now. Kind of stinks. I have to go ahead and rebalance a little. It's been my ongoing challenge for the past 11 years of my life. How to make time for myself and everyone and everything else.
So, my best friend and my cousin seem to be a little hung up on M saying the words "I love you" He did say it back to me, whether he felt like he had to or not, I have no idea. I haven't initiated, he hasn't said anything since. My cousin and friend seem to think he really needs to say it. It really doesn't bother me that he hasn't. We haven't been alone since V day, this weekend wasn't the time to say it, and he doesn't text it. I just find his actions say so much more than those words. He is the most committed bf I have ever had. He has shown me more than anyone else, including my own husband.
Should I be worried? Concerned? Is this a "must" right now? I don't think so. I don't know why people get so hung up on those words. Just looking for some opinions.
Well you wouldn’t want him to say it if he didn’t mean it and I am not suggesting that is why he hasn’t said it. I guess I wouldn’t worry about it unless you need the affirmation. I agree that actions speak louder than words. Not that you would do this but I wouldn’t say anything to him
I would not push for anything. I don't think the comments I gave to you late last week in text ever got posted here. I can't mind read any better than anyone else so all I can go by is putting myself in Ms shoes - sorta like Joseph. That whole Love ya, need ya thing for me is a step on in the way to I love you. As I said in text I've used it myself in various forms. It's not bad. It's a step on the road and certainly in the right direction. I think your cousin amd friend are picking up on this. Could M have planned not to fully say it and reacted to you. For sure that could be the case but even if it is, again it's not bad. Baby steps that are clearly in the direction you are hoping for. The thing is, any pressure here could be the old one step forward two steps back. Don't risk that. Let him take his pace. The sentiment is real. The whole meeting his son thing is real. It's all good. Don't let your cousin scare you. Yes they may be right deep down but if they are that only means he's not fully there yet. He will be. And when he is he will say it - no matter if that's months weeks or days away. Until then, love ya is better and further along than I really like you.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
Oh, I would never ever say anything. I have no need to pressure him to hear stupid words. I much more appreciate the actions in which he shows me. Introducing me to his son. Huge. Inviting me and my daughter back to the house for the family party. huge. Planning a weekend to get away with us and the kids. Huge. ALl indicate love and commitment to me.
I admittedly even have a hard time with the words now. NOt because I don't love him. I've just used them and they have been empty before. When he is ready, he will be ready. Until then, I won't say it. The ball is in his court now. and what he chooses to do with it won't impact anything. He keeps showing it, I keep showing it. That's all we need.
I agree w/the posters...saying the words "I love you" isn't something that I would expect this soon. The foundation for a good relationship starts out as friends and eventually evolves into something more serious. Just like a fine wine...it has to age for quite some time before the final product is tasteful to the palate.
I would continue as you have been, i.e., enjoying what time you spend together and the communications that you have when you are apart. When the time is right, those words will come. Do not allow others to question what you are doing. They aren't the ones walking in your shoes at the moment. Relax, and enjoy what you are doing w/your new man.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
