Midlife wife crisis5

[Ready2Change]

R2C how do I turn her on indirectly?

There is a difference between "turning her on", being attractive, and seduction. know the difference.

During this process, it is critical that you change your belief system.

Search this post for Counter-intuitive ways to attract:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2061094#Post2061094




During my sitch, I was reading at least 2 books a week trying to wrap my head around what went wrong. My X still does not talk to me. She is still angry. It has been over 10 years.

I feel that as long as your W is interacting with you, you have a chance of recon. Even after D paperwork has been filed and becomes a court order. You just can't be the guy she is divorcing. You have to completely reinvent yourself for you. If she likes what she is seeing, she may have a change of heart. She might not.

[IHCLACS]

Speaking of "broken attracts broken" anyone ever seen Silver Linings Playbook?

[Wolfman]

R2C I looked at that thread. You listed a bunch of books. Which I will definitely read some of them. I am trying to reinvent myself. The first thing I did was purchase a whole new wardrobe. Second is just always be happy and fun and upbeat. She would complain that I was always in a bad mood when she got home. But I’m not doing it for her I am doing it for my kids now. This way they want to be around me. R2C can you tell me your interpretation of attraction, and seduction? Or anyone else for that matter.

[Ready2Change]

If I observe several ladies, I can "rate" them on their attractiveness. They are not intentional doing anything to attract me. It is just their normal behavior, appearance etc.

Seduction is more about intention. If I want to seduce a woman, my behavior would be directed for reactions from her. I would be interacting with her on a regular basis. I have fun with my woman. I stir her emotions.

[SoTorn]

R2C's booklist is great. I have ordered nearly all of them from Amazon. I am now reading the Toltec wisdom books.

[Wolfman]

Question for everyone. Mother’s Day is coming up, do I take my kids to get something for wife? Or do I just let it happen?

[LH19]

You take your kids to get something for your W. She will do the same for you on Fathers Day.

[Ready2Change]

I would also let the kids spend the day with their mom on mothers day. You go GAL.

[Wolfman]

So my w made the appointment to go see the mediator lawyer. We are going to pick up the paperwork for the d. I am very sad. I want to sit her down and talk to her but I won’t, that is not DB. My question to all of you, I have to just let this happen? There is nothing I can do. It’s hard to see the life we built come to an end. I am GAL and some what excited to see what’s in store. I am just one of those people that hates change. I failed at DB, and will be a single father soon enough. I will keep validating, GAL, detaching until it is official but it’s not looking good. Thank you all you great people for the advice, I admit I dropped the ball many times. My emotions got the best of me. I will continue to stay on here even after my d. Hopefully I can help people not make the same mistakes I did. A SPECIAL THANKS TO:
Steve, LH, AS, R2C you guys did your best to keep me on track. I think I will go have a beer and go to bed early tonight. If there is anything else I should be doing at this point I am all ears.
The other thing, I have been reading some of Sandi’s old threads and man you guys were right. I lost my man card, I am going to get that back. One question about that. How do I do that when I am suppose to be validating all the time? Because Joan after rereading her threads I am ready to not take her BS anymore. Man I missed that, you guys weee telling me and I really dropped the ball, particularly mine.

[Ready2Change]

We all gave our balls away. Just take them back.

Set her free. Figure out if you want to be weekend dad or week on week off dad. Your kids need both parents equally in their lives. Go into mediation with your balls.


"I don't want to be with a woman who does not want to be with me"
"I do not share my woman with other men"
"What is best for my kids is best for me"
"Happiness is a do it yourself job"

You can handle it