Steve I am trying to hang in there. I hope I can have the end result like you. I know my w is in a thick “fog”. I will just keep doing what is advised and hopefully I will come out of this, with or without w.
AS that is the scary thing I am on 2 A/D. Yet there are still days that I am so down. I will take your advice about not being there that much. I did that yesterday. Usually I play with the kids at the house until they go to dance which is at 5:30. This time I waited till she got home and left.
IH let her deal with the pool. I agree with you about her firing you as her husband. That’s why I don’t help my w with anything around the house.
Yet here is the thing. Lately she has been coming home and telling me about her day. I am Cordial when she gets home and say hi, how are you? In the past it was just a hi and good. Now I am getting details about her day. I listen, make eye contact and validate. No expectations but she is feeling comfortable with me, just hope it’s not a friend zone thing. I know no pursuit but do I try and flirt too? I don’t want to be in the friend zone. The other thing is the problem we are having with my d. She has become so defiant to both of us it’s disgusting and she is only 11. We are both on the same page about dealing with her but it puts so much added stress on our “relationship “. Again I said it before, I really believe this is one of the big issues why my w wants divorce. So that half the time she doesn’t have the kids so she can be free.
Wow, it sounds a lot like my sitch. Right down to the defiant D! Just keep on DBing man. Her being more open to you is a good sign, no doubt about it. Just keep listening and validating. Become the man only a fool would leave. But make her do her work and deal with the consequence of her decision. DO not rescue her!
Last edited by Cadet; 05/31/1903:08 PM. Reason: Start a new thread message
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Steve since it is very similar, I’ll keep doing what I am doing. Anything else I should look for? Definitely not getting my hopes up. Do I flirt with her or not? Or just keep the path?
M:42 XW:41 T:19 M: 15 D:13 S:10 BD: 8/10/18 Moved out: 8/18 Moved in: 9/18/18 Moved out: 4/22/19 D papers signed 11/4/19 D final 3/18/20
