If you click on any Forum, e.g., "Forum - For Newcomers".. at the bottom of the screen below all the messages you should see "Category Display Options" with a dropdown saying "3 Weeks" next to it. Change this to your preferred time-frame and then click the "Change" button that's to the right.
I only played with this my first couple days here. "Forum - For Newcomers" has tons of messages per day, and the other forums seem more or less dead. Still, good options to have.
What are you searching for? I might be able to help.
I am confused by this too? What are you searching for? Did you read all the threads that I gave you in my welcome post that is stickied to the top of the forum?
As far as what applies to you in the DB - I would say mostly the entire book. And as far as advice in general, if you really feel that something does not apply to you then don't take it too personally and move on to the next thing.
The book is a lot about keeping your M from failing when everything is going okay or for when your spouse has left.
Not much for ILYBINILWY. And what to do after that but you are still sleeping in the same bed. She says that that phrase usually means there is an A.
I disagree. That's the situation I found myself in--ILYBINILWY, still sleeping in the same bed--and I felt like the book was full of information that helped my marriage.
Me: 44 H: 44 Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10 Together/Married: 22 years H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16 H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16
I fix things. I’m autistic. I’m a mechanic. It’s what I do. Patience is not my strong suit.
I’m Sorry about all the posting. It’s just I can tell that I’m not doing things right at home. So I want to get it straight. When I say I don’t get it. I really mean that.
I’m still confused on what in the DR book applies to me. Most of it seems like marriage repair after both parties agree or one person has left. It doesn’t say much about my particular sitch.
I’m still trying to figure out how to interact with her on a minute by minute basis
If I’m quiet and don’t start the convo she starts asking what’s wrong. She doesn’t believe me when I say nothing
I can also tell that my DBing is just making her think that I’m sticking my head in the sand and pretending everything is alright. Which she hates.
I’ve basically DB every time she has talked about leaving after I plead and beg. It’s very obvious at home she thinks I’m just trying the same old crap. Thats why I think it’s not working. She thinks I’m just pretending everything is fine. Which at its core is what DBing seems to be right?
And I’ll quit posting.
I’m just trying to get my gears lined up so when I take action. It’s the right action
No, the bold is not what DBing is.
Me: 44 H: 44 Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10 Together/Married: 22 years H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16 H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16
Not much for ILYBINILWY. And what to do after that but you are still sleeping in the same bed. She says that that phrase usually means there is an A.
Oz, What you need to do has nothing to do with W. It all has to do with changing the way she thinks of you. The only way for her to think of you different if for you to behave different (consistently over a long period of time). Focus on positive changes that are attractive to women in general.
Listening and understanding are one of the skills that help you be more attractive. This is just one example.
List out the areas that you would like to improve. Prioritize them and start to make changes.
I changed the way I speak. I deepened my voice. I slowed down the pace. I raise the volume when appropriate. Ladies noticed.
I changed the way I look. I have shorter hair. I have 3 inch long beard. Ladies noticed.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
