We really did make a sharp couple of coconuts. Lol
The memories are awesome. But very painful. They hurt a lot. Like a lot.
I’m still afraid GAL is gonnna make it worse but I kinda see now. She needs to miss me. Plus it’s good FOR me right? What if I’m miserable when I’m GAL?
How many of these end in reconciliation?
Also is going to wedding at the casino a bad idea. I could probably go unnoticed. If she is in A I want proof.
Why would she deny it if I ask? If I make her so miserable why stay.
The memories are awesome. But very painful. They hurt a lot. Like a lot.
Yep they do hurt. I really start to slide downhill when I think about them, so I don't do it much. Working on living in the moment and not in the future nor the past is how im working through it.
Originally Posted by ozman
I'm still afraid GAL is gonnna make it worse but I kinda see now. She needs to miss me. Plus it's good FOR me right?
Its ok to be afraid of trying something new. You'll never know unless you try. Like really try; not just a half effort once that doesn't really work because your heart isn't into it and you just concede defeat and go home and tell yourself that it didn't work. It is a GOOD THING FOR YOU!
Originally Posted by ozman
What if I'm miserable when I'm GAL?
Then you aren't in the right mindset. If you like to shoot guns, why would you be miserable shooting guns? I would propose its because you're busy thinking about her instead of what you are doing. GAL will take your mind off the situation at home, and that is for you because it is healthy for your mind and body.
Originally Posted by ozman
How many of these end in reconciliation?
Go get 5 dice, roll them and count all the dots. Then throw the dice in the trash. Eat a hotdog. Stand on your head. You nor anyone else can tell you this answer. Some do, some don't.
Originally Posted by ozman
Also is going to wedding at the casino a bad idea. I could probably go unnoticed. If she is in A I want proof.
What would it do for you? Would it make you feel better or worse to know? How would you feel if she caught you there spying on her and she wasn't with some OM? Might just wreck any progress to this point. Something to think about, because every decision has a consequence.
Originally Posted by ozman
Why would she deny it if I ask? If I make her so miserable why stay.
More than likely; from what ive read on here the only time they fess up to anything is if you have concrete proof. Dont bluff. You've either got her beat or you are beaten. Live to play another hand.
Me40; W38; S12; D9 BD11/19/2018 D filed 12/20/18 D Final 7/2020 Being the best example I know how for my kids to see.
Yea I beat the crap out of my steering wheel yesterday. Then I felt bad for the wheel lol. I’m not a violent person at all. I just don’t get it.
How could you specifically tell someone. “ I would leave you before I would cheat”. And then cheat
Go workout. This pent up energy can be positively discharged in a good way. Your steering wheel is a tough cookie but might decide to spit an airbag at you someday when it gets fed up. :-)
Do you THINK she is cheating, or do you KNOW she is cheating? I know that 98% of these things are going that way, but you are worrying about something you can't control. If she is, then she is. If she isn't, then she didn't violate her own word.
Me40; W38; S12; D9 BD11/19/2018 D filed 12/20/18 D Final 7/2020 Being the best example I know how for my kids to see.
Why would she deny it if I ask? If I make her so miserable why stay.
Hi Ozman, for the same reason people wait to get an offer letter at a new job before leaving the old one. I've had multiple women ask me to be their boyfriend *while in an existing relationship*. They didn't want to leave their current partner unless and until they felt financially and emotionally supported elsewhere.
Originally Posted by "Ozman"
Also is going to wedding at the casino a bad idea. I could probably go unnoticed. If she is in A I want proof..
It sounds like a bad idea since you said an EA wouldn't be the end for you. If she dances with someone, will that make you feel any better or your mind any more certain? If detected, you play the paranoid husband, or the controlling ex who just can't understand "It's over" and that now she's free to do what she wants.
Then you aren't in the right mindset. If you like to shoot guns, why would you be miserable shooting guns? I would propose its because you're busy thinking about her instead of what you are doing. GAL will take your mind off the situation at home, and that is for you because it is healthy for your mind and body.
Well I’m pretty sure no one at her job knows she is married. Cause a wedding is something you take a spouse to. If she dances with someone that wouldn’t bother me. People dance at a wedding.
I just got a ball in my gut saying the wedding is when EA turns into PA. perfect opportunity. If she is really late “I was at the party”. She knows I won’t be there. Plus weddings usually tend to put people in the mood. Her crush will be there I’m sure and it’s the first time they can be together with no constraints.
I just have a bad feeling
I could get over an EA with time. I’m not so sure about a PA. I know sex for a woman is a lot more emotional than it is for a man. If she goes that far. Im not sure.
oz, you've already said most of this. Try to calm down. Remember, you need to be focused on yourself. You are laserfocused in her and driving yourself crazy.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
