Essentially it comes down to hypergamy oz and the desire for women to find the strongest most desirable partner. If you are depressed, not taking care of yourself physically, and not advancing yourself professionally eventually a women will start to question whether or not you are the best partner for her.
That is why we tell you to forget everything else and work on improving yourself!
After a very long tiring weekend, W and I got home from evening worship last night around 8pm. She got comfy, got on the couch, and started playing game on her phone.
I did a bunch of stuff outside, then came in the house and started emptying the dishwasher and refill from the dirties in the kitchen sink. When she heard the dishes she hollered, what are you doing? ME: Nothing. Her: I will do the dishes tomorrow. ME: No it is okay, I can do them tonight. Her: THen I will do them tonight. Me: No you need to relax, hon. Her: SO do you! Me: No, that isn't me, I have to stay busy!
GAL. 180s. Even detachment (I prefer the term self-differentiation). They never end!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I heard similar remarks from my W this weekend Steve. She said several times how happy how much we got done together. Like she was trying to make a point.
And the cool thing was. I was doin it for me lol. I’ve been focusing on me. And I’m enjoying focusing on me. And she seems impressed a little. Lol
So uhm. Tomorrow is our 8th anniversary. Things are going great plutonically. Nothing intimate. You guys know from my updates. Things have improved a lot but we have a long way to go
Suggestions for anniversary? Small gift? Plain card? “Happy anniversary”? Nothing?
I do not think your wife is cheating on you based off what you have told us. I have a habit of buying things for my lady but not giving them to her right away....IE have something ready in case she gives you something, but do not initiate.
Personally, I would have several different cards, a simple set of ear rings or necklace, maybe a plant...
Normally I would say make plans to go out alone, but I don't think that is good advise for you...unless you have rose colored glasses on still. Make plans to be really busy around the house.
Be prepared for the worse case, prepare for some unexpected interactions
W:"Bla bla bla you forgot our anniversary bla bla bla bla" H"I did not forget. it was my understanding that you did not want to celebrate" Then get ready to listen and validate.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
R2C. I don’t THINK I have rose colored glasses on. Key word think. I’m able to see things much more objectively now. But I have a habit of trying to read too much into stuff. I have made great strides in this area though
I have actually been focused so much on me that I almost forgot it was tomorrow lol.
So here is what I know
1 I’m actually a bit nervous for tomorrow cause I feel like it could tip the scales one way or another. Who knows though right? Lol
2 we are actually getting along better in day to day like than we have in years. I’m acting like a man around the house and she treats me like one and usually respects my decisions when she asks my opinion which is quite often. When I make a decision without consulting her first she usually doesn’t challenge me and when she does, it’s a polite “what do you think about this method” type of question. On the flip side I always keep her feelings and well being in consideration when decision making. (This is a MAJOR 180 for me). We laugh and talk and interact like we should have all this time
3 there is an absolute no intimacy wall between us. She has shown signed if improvement here (little things like sitting beside me). But I don’t read into them at all because I have learned. (Go me!). I just enjoy them when they roll around. Aside from that though. There is no intimacy or touching. Zip nada nill You get the point lol
She has opened up a bit emotionally though. Whatever that’s worth.
But I look at this all very objectively. Like I’m watching two other people from a distance
So that is where we out on our anniversary eve.
I wanna get this right tomorrow. No screw ups. No pursuit. No pressure. Just cool attractive awesome Oz. Or rather Ozsome
Essentially it comes down to hypergamy oz and the desire for women to find the strongest most desirable partner. If you are depressed, not taking care of yourself physically, and not advancing yourself professionally eventually a women will start to question whether or not you are the best partner for her.
That is why we tell you to forget everything else and work on improving yourself!
1000% Truth. This all comes down to attraction, hypergamy, and the bigger better deal compared and fantasized in their minds. The best anecdote or the best revenge regardless if it goes upwards or sideways is to improve yourself for you. They are with the winner at the finish line. They don't emotionally support the guy who came in dead last. Just part of the game and nature.
All the male elk make small groups of females. Each time two groups meet, the two males face off for dominance, the more dominate male takes all the females. This repeats over and over until on male is controlling 100+ females. Guess who gets to breed with the females. Mostly the one male. All the losers don't get to breed. They were in the friend zone while they females waited for the best male.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Well it’s my anniversary. I think I’m gonna go downstairs and tell her “happy anniversary” and then leave on my morning run while she finishes getting ready for work. Thoughts?
