I want everyone to understand, since it is buried back in my other thread. She wants to stay together. While she was initially defiant, she ended up quite sad and contrite. I spoke Frank to her last night. I didn't let her turn it around. I held her feet to the fire. And it eventually got her to understand that her actions were wrong. Even when she tried to bash my snooping I made sure she knew that a redirect like that was inappropriate. "How I found out is not important. That there was something to find out is!"
She eventually got that.
I think the hard part for me is watching her go through withdrawal. It's coming. I have a huge GAL scheduled for tomorrow. Hitting an amusement park with a buddy. I'll be gone all day.
My DBing has been great through all of this including going back to last year. I think my reaction had even proven that I am lovingly detached. I've been a DB Ninja!!
Last edited by Steve85; 08/28/1905:50 PM.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
AS after her initial rebellion to my confronting, she has now turned quite contrite. Uninstalled all games from her phone. She's shared all passwords. She unlocked her phone.
Yes but it's not over. You still have a rebellious WW on your hands and you need to deal with that in a patient, loving manner. Don't know if you Googled as I suggested but one of the recommendations you'll see when dealing with a rebellious teen is to always RESPECT them. You have to be firm, but you CAN be firm in a loving and respectful manner. I think the same goes for dealing with a WW.
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I have huge concerns here guys. She no longer has her business. Now she is giving up everything that occupied her time. I almost feel like I'm opening her up to a full blown PA. These guys she's engaged with have been hundreds of miles away, even thousands, and in other countries. What if her attention now turns to someone local that I can't track.
Are you actually saying that you wish you hadn't exposed her emotional affair because you're afraid it may push her into a PA? So, you think just ignoring it would have been a better choice? What would you say if someone else posted that? You offer fantastic advice to others, but you're so close to your own situation that I think you're having trouble applying the same great logic you have to yourself!
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but I'll always wonder if my actions last night pushed her to that.
You didn't push her into anything, she went freely and willingly. As far as you knew everything was great. This was HER CHOICE. Quit blaming yourself!
Thanks AS. My point on the EA vs PA was the EA was with someone far away with little chance of ever meeting in person. Now that all electronic devices are open, she could go off the grid. Your right, it is irrational. Thanks for the 2x4.
I'll do some reading on handling rebellious teenagers.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
