What new behaviors do you want to "practice" this weekend?
Weekends are usually pretty busy with kids activities and then when we are back home I tend to let the kids veg out in front of tv or video games. I would sleep or do my own thing, so this weekend I want to have the family spend more time doing things together. Be it all together or just the kids I want some quality family time. During those time it will give me a chance to practice patience with the kids and if I have to correct them, to do it in more loving manor and explain why I am doing it.
I also want to continue having the family attended mass.
During those time it will give me a chance to practice patience with the kids and if I have to correct them, to do it in more loving manor and explain why I am doing it.
Google "parenting with love and logic". Worked well for me with my kids.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Count down from 100 by threes to zero. repeat Focus on breathing in and out fully and slowly Focused relaxing parts of my body. Starting at my head and working to toes. Close eyes. relax face. work down. Any thoughts. "I will worry about that tomorrow"
Talk to med doc if needed. I had these pills that had me out within 30 minutes. Woke up 8 hours later. Daily exercise helped as well.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Offered to take family out to dinner last night. W declined, wanted time to herself. Had a great dinner with the kids. Really enjoyed the time. W fell asleep in the MRB but when got up and went downstairs to couch after I got in. Definitely did not feel good but her choice.
Took family to mass today and mall. Great time had by all.
Start a BB league tonight. Looking forward to that.
W fell asleep in the MRB but when got up and went downstairs to couch after I got in. Definitely did not feel good but her choice.
DId feel better than sleeping on couch yourself?
Hank, at this point we aren't dealing with the ideal, we are dealing with levels of less than ideal. You getting into the MB and her getting up and going to the couch is MORE ideal than you being a beta and setting up on the couch yourself.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Been a bit since I posted on here. Things remain the same in the Sitch but feels a whole lot worse. W has initiated R talks twice in the past week and it is more of the same. Too little too late, Why now, Torn, Angry, etc. She had made it clear she wants nothing to do with me outside of the kids. It cuts deep every time I realize this. I know I am failing at this, this is supposed to be for me but I keep getting my hopes up and then shot down. It’s only been 2 weeks but feels like 2 months. Everything she said that she has ever wanted is right there in front of her but I can’t get her to let go of the hate and grab it.
I have such a hard time understanding the why. Why break up the family, why go through the pain, why struggle financially, why do this. I’m seeing doctors but I can’t move on. I know she hurting, I know it’s selfish to only think of me.
You are still trying to apply logic to an emotional problem. Don't.
Quote
Let me give you some counsel, bastard,“ Lannister said. „Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strenght. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.
You can choose to let this "hurt" you or to consider yourself iron in the fire, becoming stronger. Whichever you choose, you're right.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
