Boundary after big D part five

[Mach40]

Old thread
https://www.divorcebusting.com/foru...at&Main=63510&Number=2939494#Pos

[Mach40]

Not a big deal, but I did lose 10 lbs. Changed my diet. This has happened within 2 weeks.
I try to discourage breakfast, or I will eat very little just to take the hunger bite off.
Then I kept pushing lunch later and later.. Now I am down to 1 maybe 2 meals a day.. Its hard due to different work hours sometimes.
Its a small step, but I can see losing more too due to where I work, lots of walking, going up and down ladders. Not a desk job..
Also, my daughters ( both step) are getting more and more close with me.. Doing things together, lunch, dinner, shopping.
Youngest called and didnt say my name, just straight up said Dad today... Not sure what happened, but I will take it. She has explained to me in the past I am her Dad, due to biological dad leaving at around 3.5 years.. But she has always called me by my first name, as her older sister did.

[DnJ]

Hi Mach

Nice job with the weight loss. I am doing the same strategy and have similar results.

You must feel pretty good with daughter calling you Dad! That’s so heartwarming.

D

[Mach40]

You have no idea what this meant to me.. Dad..
Weight loss in reality is just caloric intake. Reduce it, lose weight.

[BL42]

Mach40,

Keep up the healthy eating and exercise...start throwing in some weight lifting as well.

I can imagine hearing her say "dad" instead of your name really meant a lot. Happy to hear it :-)

[Mach40]

Last night my oldest came over. She is stressed about the potential loss of her Moms house. Ex hasnt had much success in the past 6 months as a Realtor. Says allot because she is a workaholic.. Fighter.
So, my oldest is really stressed out about her B day next week, Christmas, and her daughters B day in January. I know its a ulterior motive. Not sure what she is stressed about with me. My daughters/grand kids lives wont be changed due to her Moms financial hardship.
But, White Knight Syndrome kicked in. I am holding the reigns on this horse I am riding. Not going to help. Ex mentioned it when we took our pet into Vet for some help. I held my tongue.
, and said I know you, you will make it work and I know its real tough.. Did the best I could.
Still its tough. She did not ask for a thing.. Nothing..

[Mach40]

Just more rambling. Today is a little tradition I do for my girls and grandkids. I take them to get a tree for my house, and they decorate it.. Lots of laughs, and joy to me. Not sure of exact time they will be here for presents, due to youngest work schedule.. But, we will have presents, hot cocoa and probably an appropriate meal for time of day..
On a flip side, I am going to miss the Christmas day with everyone of course, but it is what it is.
Her loss, I am far better man. New guy, I do envy, as he gets to have all the benefits of being with the whole family during Christmas.. Not that he is family, yet?, but he gets to see it and experience it.

[BL42]

Mach40,

Thanksgiving and Christmas are the worst, then New Years and Valentines throw daggers at your heart.

Sounds like you're struggling a bit right now with the Holidays. Sorry. It can be tough.

But, White Knight Syndrome kicked in. I am holding the reigns on this horse I am riding. Not going to help. Ex mentioned it when we took our pet into Vet for some help. I held my tongue. , and said I know you, you will make it work and I know its real tough.. Did the best I could. Still its tough. She did not ask for a thing.. Nothing..

Good. She moved out and you're divorced and she's dating another man - no need to bail her out financially.

Not to take away, but both of my daughters came over after their shindig with their Momma, Grandpa and Aunt and Uncles.

That's awesome. Sounds like you've really made a positive impact on their life.

Ex texted and said " I hate that the family is broken like this" right after getting there for their big dinner

Hope you didn't respond. It was her decision. She just texted you to assuage her guilt.

and her boyfriend was there too..

New guy, I do envy, as he gets to have all the benefits of being with the whole family during Christmas.. Not that he is family, yet?, but he gets to see it and experience it.

That hurts. Sorry man. Keep in mind he's been in the picture for a brief moment compared to your decades. He could very well be gone next Thanksgiving. And even if he's not you're gonna be feeling much better regardless.


Mach40 - How's the GAL going? Are you meeting any guys to hang out with?

[Mach40]

Did soup kitchen, sort of. Boxed up a bunch of meals. Felt good. Thought it would be like the old days, where you serve people. Nope.
Been hanging with my neighbors allot. We just hang out, as they all have dogs and we shoot to poop. One lady has joined. No ring, really nice. She has stopped by out front a few times and we talk. Just general stuff, holidays, etc. Nothing major.

As far as Ex, we were/are amicable. Thats the best part.
Kids are really getting closer. Not sure why, but its good.
Oldest said my youngest is not liking the new guy. Said she was very confrontational with him at Thanksgiving dinner. None of my business. I think she feels he is a threat deep down.. None of my business.
Holidays do suck. Especially when you had them together.

[BL42]

Mach40,

Did soup kitchen...Felt good.

Awesome! I did one last year on my first Christmas Day without the kids.

One lady has joined. No ring, really nice. She has stopped by out front a few times and we talk. Just general stuff, holidays, etc. Nothing major.

This seems like a prelude to an entanglement.

As far as Ex, we were/are amicable. Thats the best part.

Is it? Better than constantly fighting for sure, but sounds disingenuous - certainly not what you want.

Kids are really getting closer. Not sure why, but its good.

Good stuff. Sounds like you have a solid relationship.

Oldest said my youngest is not liking the new guy. Said she was very confrontational with him at Thanksgiving dinner.

Confrontational? How? It's not uncommon for kids to push back on any new partner of their parent, but they are adults and you are separated many years and divorced. Didn't sound like an affair / break up the marriage situation.

I think she feels he is a threat deep down..

Threat how? As in may be around for awhile, or a threat to her relationship with her mother, or being protective of you?

None of my business.

True.

Holidays do suck. Especially when you had them together.

Holidays are tough. Hang in there.

Did you explore the dating apps in SC yet? Wonder if it's a lot different than Alaska.