Several times each year, I offer couples a down-to-earth, psychobabble-free skill-building seminar- The Marriage Breakthrough™-that changes their lives. At each seminar, couples ask me, “Why can’t you come home with us?” or “It would be great to have you as our personal coach, at home, when we need you.” Finally, I decided to do something that would make bringing my marriage-enriching advice home a reality. With a crew of nine- producer, cameramen, lighting and sound experts- we captured The marriage Breakthrough on tape. Now, you can attend this information-filled seminar in the privacy of your own home, at your convenience!
Who is The Marriage Breakthrough™ Video Seminar for?
This program is for you if:
1.You want to feel closer and more connected to your spouse
2.You want to save your marriage from the brink of divorce
3.You want to convince your spouse that your marriage is worth saving 4.You simply want to learn how to have a loving, lasting relationship
As many of you know, I have made it my life’s passion to help couples strengthen their marriages. from the many couples in my practice, I have learned what works and what doesn’t. The Marriage Breakthrough™ Seminar is filled with skill-building information that can help you make your relationship more loving. One of the real benefits of this seminar is its powerful message about the importance of working things out rather than getting out.
If you have been feeling desperate about your rocky relationship and your efforts to improve things have only pushed your spouse away, if you have been wishing that someone who knows about the pitfalls of divorce could talk sense to your spouse, don’t wait another day. Ask your spouse to do you one favor. Pop in this video and let me share what I know about why divorce doesn’t work and why marriages are worth saving. Shortly after the tape starts rolling, you will hear from a couple whose marriage was nearly over and how they rekindled their love using the skills I teach in the seminar. Then, learn the skills you need to make this happen in your own marriage. As you listen to couples in the video discuss their issues you’ll learn that, no matter what kinds of problems you’re experiencing, you and your spouse are not alone and that there are solutions waiting to be discovered.
Still wondering whether this program will benefit you?
Here are some things to consider:
Do you or your spouse feel that your relationship seems to take a back seat to everything else?
Has your spouse have "fallen out of love" with you?
Are you or your spouse feeling hopeless and considering separation or divorce?
Do you keep arguing about the same old subjects- money, sex, children, in-laws, housework, trust and so on- in a hurtful manner?
Do you feel angry, resentful, and taken for granted much of the time?
Do you wish your spouse would try to understand your point of view?
Do you or your spouse having a hard time letting go of the past?
Do you lead fairly separate lives and feel lonely?
Are you trying to reconcile after divorce?
But what if my spouse won’t watch this seminar?
It is often the case that one spouse is more motivated than the other to work on a marriage. This is normal. The tools taught in this video seminar are designed to be effective even if you watch alone. So, if your spouse refuses to join you, don't be discouraged, watch it alone anyway. You'll learn new methods for getting through to your spouse and starting a solution avalanche.
The Marriage Breakthrough™ Video Seminar includes:
-Four VHS video tapes which capture the full content of my day-long live marriage enrichment/divorce prevention seminar for couples, approximately six hours of content -12 page booklet containing seminar outline and exercises that you and your spouse can complete to fully participate in the seminar.
Tell me more about the seminar
Let's face it. Falling in love is easy, staying in love is another matter. It's downright tough. And why shouldn't it be? We're not born knowing how to have successful relationships. Marriages don't come with instruction manuals. Marriage licenses are one of the few licenses people can get without an education. So how do you know what to do after we fall in love? We import the lessons about relationships that we learned as children into our marriages as adults. But many of us haven't had healthy role models. That's why we shoot from the hip, with lousy results. Having a great marriage isn't about choosing the right person, it's about doing the right things to keep love alive.
The good news is that research has taught us a great deal about what it takes to make love last. It takes skills, relationship skills. And the even better news is that these skills can be learned. You can learn how to communicate effectively. You can learn how to co-parent cooperatively. You can learn how to negotiate your differences about sex, money, in-laws, how free time is
spent, who does what around the house, how best to take care of your health and so on. You can learn how to fight fairly. You can even learn how to forgive your spouse for wrongdoings and let go of emotionally-damaging grudges.
But this is not to say that I don't understand the important role feelings play in relationships that work. In fact, I'm convinced that people won't practice the skills they learn unless their hearts are open. Therefore, throughout the skill-building day, I intersperse
engaging, inspiring, and humorous stories that touch people's hearts and breed a sense of forgiveness, acceptance and caring.
What people are saying about the seminar?
Below are comments taken directly off of our evaluation sheets that are completed at the end of the day. See for yourself how couples appreciate the learning that takes place in this one-day seminar.
"I thought we were at the point of 'too little, too late' - Now I know it’s not too late to re-open my heart.”
“Your seminar is terrific. I felt as if you had a video camera in our house !”
“Wonderful, thank you. Now I know we are not the only couple whose marriage changed when children came into our life. And now we know how to get our marriage back.”
“Thanks for giving us the positive fact that there are other solutions besides divorce. You gave us hope.”
“One of the most balanced approaches I have ever heard. Men and women both need to be celebrated. Both need to be listened to. Excellent seminar!"
“I learned that proactive solutions to anger, conflict and communication are within each of us.”
“This is the best seminar I’ve ever attended. Even my grouchy husband enjoyed it!'
“You have it nailed- working on solutions, not focusing on problems!”
"Your material is superb! Thanks!"
"Michele's style of communicating is extremely effective- fun, informative and gutsy!"
"Revolutionized my approach to people-helping" (Pastor)
Invest is a Marriage Breakthrough™ Video Seminar for a loved one- It will be a gift that lasts a lifetime!
I just finished watching the Marriage Breakthrough Seminar tapes and I want you to know I think they were incredible. I honestly learned so much, and recognized the things my H and I have been doing for years that are so subtle, yet damaging.
My H of 15 yrs moved out 7 weeks ago due partly to MLC and the stress of a downhill ride with my diagnosis of Fibromyalgia and sudden poor health for 8 months. Neither of us coped well, he had a 3-4 month EA which has been over 3 months now.
I have grown, learned, and changed thanks to your books and this BB, my health is improving and I am in a good place emotionally and physically. H moving out actually was very beneficial for me, but he has not changed at all. H is still bitter, angry, miserable, and has numerous physical ailments. Our 2 kids are miserable, and one is having serious enough problems for me to seek a counselor but H refuses to acknowledge that he has anything to do with the changes in the kids.
He told me our marriage is over and is not interested in working on it. He has seen the positive changes in me. I have a thread called "Keeping PMA".
I would really like to give the tapes for H to watch because so many things hit close to home, especially the 3rd and 4th tape. I am not sure how to approach him without it appearing like pushing and him becoming defensive. He hasn't read DR, but I think asking him to do that would be too much. So should I try to have him watch the tapes, and how do I approach him without it becoming ugly?
MsBean, Thank you so much for your kind feedback. I really do appreciate it and I'm delighted that so much of it rang true for you. I wish your husband weren't so bitter and that he was as open-minded as you. You sound like an incredible person dealing with lots of challenges.
As far as getting your husband to watch the tapes- you can try. Here's how to do it. Tell him that you watched them and found them helpful in explaining why things have been so tough for the two of you. Tell him that I have a no-nonsense approach to relationships that men seem to like a lot- (no touchy-feely stuff) I give people lots of ideas about things they can do differently to feel better about themselves and each other. You can also say that it might not work for your marriage, but you thought he might get something out of it anyway. (By the way, of course I believe it can help your marriage, I just don't want you to sound to optimistic or pushy.)
Then give him a tape. You can start from the beginning, or you can cue it up to the part you think he might really like or identify with.
However, keep in mind, the information you learned will be useful to you even if he never sees the tapes at all.
Hang in there and keep feeling better and better. Your kids will benefit from your strength. Michele
I just received your seminar tapes and book in the mail and I love them!!! I recommend these to everyone. I felt like I was truly at your seminar. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for all that you do for all of us. I wish I had known about this site when my husband left. I feel like I have so many friends that I am not alone. I have so much faith in my husband and my marriage thanks to you.
Sally
GOD HEALS HURTING MARRIAGESwww.rejoiceministries.org
I have read both of your books and I would very much like to attend the seminar in Chicago in a couple of weeks with me husband. He moved out the beginning of January and filed D papers the end of March. Everything is happening so very quickly and I feel powerless to even slow things down. I have only asked him for an opportunity to examine the possibilities, which could include your seminar. So far he has been unwilling to agree to attend. I have 2 teenage boys who are suffering because of their fathers actions. I have asked him to read the part of your book on infidelity and MLC. I keep hoping that something will eventually make sense to him. Any suggestions you could offer about getting him to attend the seminar would be appreciated.
Bailee, As a rule, as most people around here know, pressuring a reluctant spouse to do something for the marriage doesn't often work and can even backfire somewhat. So, you have to be careful in how you approach this. I have 2 suggestions.
You can say, "Look, I know you've filed for divorce and that you want to end this marriage. I get that. But after ____(fill in the blank) years of marriage, I am asking you one favor, even if it's a departing favor. Come with me to this seminar. You won't have to talk about your thoughts or feelings in public. All you will have to do is listen and talk to me from time to time. I know you have your heart set on leaving, but I think you can do this last thing for me. It will help me get closure."
Tell him you will set everything up and all he has to do is show up.
If he doesn't want to join you, you can come alone. Many people do that. It can be helpful.
Also, one other thought. If he won't commit to coming to the seminar, you can consider purchasing the Marriage Breakthrough seminar videotape and see if you can get him to commit to watching it with you and doing the exercises.
Hope this helps and hope to see you and many other DB members there! Michele
Thanks for the input, however, my husband of 22+ years isn't willing to attend the seminar. He has agreed to see a MC who is solutions based, but he wants no talk of marriage counseling only to talk about better communication as we progress through the D process. I will continue to hope and work toward reconciliation. It seems I have really done things all wrong, hopefully I can learn from my mistakes and make positive progress.
I am an optimist and always hopeful. Hopefully he will see the changes and find that there is still something to believe in.
Hi Michele, Your My Hero. I'v been making new friends here the last month or so, but still get discouraged easly. I kicked my wife out after several internet affairs, At first she wanted to come back but now she's wanting A D, so she can marry OM, ASAP! I spent several hours at several bookstores, Decided that DB was the best for me. After reading it I looked for anything about you online, now here I am. If it wasn't for this place, I'd be about hopeless now. My wife and I are seeing A theropist, but I'll she'll say is she wants D right away. Does A situation like this sound hopeless? She's planning on leaving to another state, once D is final. I would Do anything to have you as my theropist. This is the next best thing. I do plan on doing a phone session, but how can you pay for it with no credit card? Is there another waying of doing this? Thanks again for having this wonderful life-Saving board for all of to feel we belong and have people who care becouse they are in the same situations. This is so important to have when we feel so lost and lonely! Terry-
Here's a wonderful letter I received from a dear woman who attended the seminar in April. Isn't life great? **************** Dear Michele:
I'm very moved by what's happening in my life right now. Jason, my husband, keeps responding to my changes, so I keep making them. We're on track to be a couple again in time for the May anniversary of "our first kiss" 17 years ago. The way we're behaving, it's going to be a romantic anniversary.
I'm just amazed. Moved, astounded and humble, too. And you know, we were bitter, resentful and estranged in December when I picked up your book.
I would NEVER in a million years have been willing to soften first if your words hadn't reached something (sensible) in me. I would NEVER have been able to open my heart. I was hurt, righteous, adamant and miserable not very long ago. We were both depressed and sinking.
Your book opened my eyes and offered me a lifeline. I'm not kidding! I didn't believe you at first, but I had to laugh as I did the exercises and saw I was being stubborn. I softened. I stopped accusing. I shut up and dressed up and attended to myself -- what did I have to lose?
Your book and your messageboard guided me. I would have retaliated and initiated an affair if you hadn't told me I could save my M. I'm proud to say I listened and learned.
I'm doing things differently now, and not out of desperation and pain, but because I want to thank my H for being nice to me. Yes, nice! The MEAN guy who stonewalled me for months DANCED with me at a party last Saturday and winked "let's go home early."
And he came home with with his cheery, friendly, no-longer-resentful, no-longer-grudge-holding, no-longer-self-pitying wife.
Right now I'm totally absorbed by DB -- I gave my DR to my sister. I feel like the missing piece of the puzzle of how relationships work has fallen into place in my life and I want to apply these ideas all over the place.
Once again, thanks from the heart, and smiles from a satisfied customer.
I placed my order yesterday and I'm praying that I can talk my wife into at least watching the first one. While I think my 180 has been noticed, there has been a setback (nothing I instigated, but I couldn't just walk away..arrgh) and I need to try something else.
Just wanted to let you know that I FINALLY got control of my TV long enough to watch the first of the Marriage Breakthrough tapes, and it was AWESOME!
As you may know, I've listened to the KLA tapes dozens of times, and found that "listening" to you TALK about the DB principles made them sink into my head a lot deeper, much more so than just reading the words in your books.
However, after WATCHING even just the first tape, some of what you're saying has even more meaning! The way that the audience participates is especially great. They ask some great questions, things that I hadn't even thought of. Things that help to define the possibilities of DB'ing even more clearly, in common, everday, situations.
I'm anxiously looking forward to sending our young male child on a mission to help out his grandma tomorrow, so I can regain control of the TV, and watch the rest of the tapes!
JJ
From my experiences at home, I have been quite "enlightened" to how important the "medium is to the message" when it comes to how people learn best. While I'm pretty good at learning from reading, my wife is a "fiction reader", and has a hard time really absorbing ideas from the written word. Too much like reading a high school text book, I guess! She learns much better by "seeing things in action", more of a "hands-on" learner, which I think the videos are most excellent for! I'm sure that there are MANY others out there who are the same way.
I would suggest that you get these video tapes if you can. If you can't afford them at this time, try hitting up your local library, and see if you can request that they get them. The tapes would even be a great investment for whichever church you might be attending.
JJ
Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!
Michele; I swear that the more and more I watch DB, the more I see the errors that I have PERSONALLY made in my relationship with my Wife. I can now understand how she would think that I didn't show her that I cared about her. Of course it is a dual responsibility. And now that things are coming out more and more as to why we find ourselves in this position. And EVERYTHING is soooooo fixable.
I have found an actual MC who knows of you and applies your same theories in her approach to MC. Now it is just a matter of getting my W. to actually go to a session or two just to see what happens.
Do you have any ideas on how I might be able to accomplish this? Or even have her watch the DB videos? She seemed really interested when I told her that it only takes ONE person to make a relationship change into something much better. But I didn't go into it any further.
Thank you for your books and your videos. I am hoping that I can save my M before it is final in June. Again thank you.
It's great that you are personally getting a lot of good information from The Marriage Breakthrough videos. It might be nice for your wife to watch them, as well. And maybe one day she will want to. But in the meantime - as you know - it is not necessary for both spouses to be active DBers. You can cause positive change to happen all on your own.
One suggestion... if you're looking for help coming up with some new creative ideas to achieve your goals for your marriage, you should schedule a telephone consultation with a Divorce Busting Coach. Your DB Coach will give you very specific advice that applies to your unique situation. DB Coaches have helped countless people all over the world save their marriages and keep their families together. To schedule an appointment to speak with a DB Coach, call The Divorce Busting Center at 815-337-8000.
I just ordered the "Marriage Breakthrough" videotapes and I hope they’ll come in soon. W has made an appointment with D attorney. I told her that I understand why she wishes to pursue that route, but I disagree with the D until we have exhausted all other possibilities. W asked what the other possibilities were, however she developed a headache and we never finished our conversation. I would like to present the "Marriage Breakthrough" videotapes as an option, but I don’t want to come across as being manipulative. Any suggestions on how to present this option to W?
MakDaddy's (Charles Bronson) New Thread - Still Focusing on positives
I just wanted to say I bought 'Divorce Busting' the book, yesterday from your store as a wedding present for my friend who is getting married on 20th March.
I think that if all couples learnt DB techniques when they first wed, then they wouldn't have to visit these BB's years later and there would be less need for divorce. All couples should have these books!
Although I didn't reunite with my ex, DB'ing had a dramatic affect on him and he did return to me on numerous ocassions. Before DB'ing he was taking me to court, just 2 months after DB'ing, we were posing for a family portrait.
Both he and I have said that if it weren't for the extended court action, we would have reunited. I think DB'ing can work in a lot of 'standard' separations. It also helped me recover from depression and get a life of my own. I would have gone under without DB'ing.
Now I've met someone new and I am going to use these techniques from the word go, so I never have to come back here, destroyed because he's leaving.
I feel we have a better chance of success now and that these techniques are what every couple should know, so the books should be for sale at bridal fairs.
we are listening to the tapes together. dh says he wants a divorce because he has tried and has fallen out of love, isn't happy. says he can see that i have changed. says are problems are deeper than those on the tapes. does say he is glad we got the tapes as has started good conversations. how do i get him to open his heart?
