Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 12 of 12 1 2 10 11 12
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 8,334
Likes: 1
Moderator
OP Offline
Moderator
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 8,334
Likes: 1
From DB Coach Laurie

*****************************************************

During this difficult time, you may get many opinions (from your attorney, family, friends, us, etc...) which can really get confusing. So, please remind yourself what your R goals are first of all. What do you want to see happen between you and your W that is realistic and a bit hopeful during these next few weeks? (Possible example: I would like my W to be less angry with me.)

Then, once you remind yourself of that, ask yourself what kind of behaviors you can show that would HELP move your R forward with your W? (Example: I want my W to be less angry toward me and it seems that my being around her, calling her, asking her to dinner, etc., gets her hostility up, therefore, I need to have a lot less contact, possibly no contact at all and will not pursue asking her to dinner, movies, etc., with her at all for the next two weeks.)

Is your goal D or is it improving your R? Those most likely are two different goals and will determine two different sets of behaviors from you, I believe. So, please decide which goal you are striving for first and that will determine what you should do, OK?
_________________________
Laurie Divorce Busting Relationship Coach


JJ

Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!
Joined: Mar 1999
Posts: 4,757
Tia Offline
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Mar 1999
Posts: 4,757
^

Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 861
Likes: 4
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 861
Likes: 4
.


Michele Weiner-Davis
The Divorce Busting Center

Transform your marriage with a private 2-day intensive with Michele Weiner-Davis. http://www.themarriageintensive.com
Email michele@divorcebusting.com
Page 12 of 12 1 2 10 11 12

Moderated by  Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard