Quote: Thank you all for your encouragment. It's almost like I have my own cheerleading squad in the bedroom!
Well yes, you do!! But try not to think about that while you're there. You'll bust up laughing right in the middle and your wife will think ???
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
Ok, you're right. I can't start down this path or I will be in SERIOUS trouble the next time anything starts to happen.
W: Honey, what are you looking at? M: Nothing (kissing her). W: No, I swear you were looking at something over there. M: Well, I guess I was. You see, there are these people dressed in cheerleading outfits over there rooting me on. W: Um...is this some desperate way you came up with to tell me you'd like me to wear a cheerleading cosutume to bed? M: Um...no...it's just that there are all these people we don't really know that are so happy I "got some" and now I have this vision of them in my head, all dressed up as cheerleaders, doing little cheers everytime I make a move. W: Get off me you strange, strange man...I knew you changed but this is a little weird even for the "new you"...
I'm starting to get visuals and where Rob is concerned, that may not be good. The rest of you, well...we'll see what I can come up with. Needless to say, I may have sabatoged myself through all this. Once all is said and done, I may need the little blue pill to, uh, get things going again, lol.
Then again, I'm sure many of you would look fantastic in a cheerleading uni...
Okay, this is a bit out there, but years ago, there was this little movie called Kentucky Fried Movie which was basically a movie of SNL type skits....one of them that was pretty funny (and appropriate perhaps to this sitch) was one with the sex olympics...basically involved a couple of sports commentators calling the "moves" of a couple. LOL that's what this whole thing has morphed into for me. If you've seen the movie, you can relate. If not, well the cheerleading thing works too.
Okay, I'm done commenting on your life!
"Achieve success, but without vanity; Achieve success, but without aggression; Achieve success, but without gain; Achieve success, but without force." Lao Tzu
Guy, KFM was/is one of my all-time favs! I like the Enter the Dragon skit. Anyway, yes, enough of all that.
My biggest problem, and it's a pretty good one to have (assuming there isn't something I don't know...damn that paranoia) is that things are TOO normal, i.e. just like they were one or two years ago when all this supposedly started in my W's head. I am fighting to break the old cycles and I THINK it's working but it's hard not to be afraid "normalcy" when it seemed like that's what got us here in the first place.
I think by virtue of all we have gone through, and at least my growth, should make it impossible to ever go back to the "old" marriage but I still guard against that daily. It's a struggle to say the least.
GH, This is where I am right now too. (BTW, I have moved over to the piecing threads). Everything seems back to normal, is this good? Although I don't believe that it can be the same as it was because I am not the same as I was pre-bomb. I do not take my H or our R for granted anymore. I am more spontaneous and happy. Because of my new job, I now have more adult friends, some of which I introduced my H to this past weekend. This past weekend I also initiated , which is something I haven't done in years. So I guess what I am trying to say for you is that things really aren't the same because you are no longer the same. Anyway, I'll take "normal" any day over what we had this past year.
Quote: This past weekend I also initiated , which is something I haven't done in years.
So does that mean you are x2 in the ML department? I guess I am greedy because until I get the second under my belt I won't really believe it wasn't just a weak moment from an otherwise abstaining woman. I know that's cynical but...
So, you move your thread. I can't bring myself to do that. I guess it's just the comfort of the people I know here. Maybe I should move eventually too.
Well, GH, we will come with you, even if you start piecing Which I believe you are doing, correct? I am proud of you. And I as part of your loyal cheerleading squad, look forward to hearing about the x2 and x3 and on and on until it's such a normal occurence you don't remember what it's like NOT to... Anyway, GH, I just want to say that it might be healthy for you to let go of "Infidelity" as the cornerstone of your sitch, and to take on that your R is evolving. BTW, I am very proud of all the work you have done. Keep at it. The P/A thing you have struggled with is NASTY if you are on the other side. My birth mother was P/A with me last week, wanted something and couldn't be straight with me about it. Makes me not want to be around her. So don't ever let "normal" take you back there. So what would it look like to have "normal" be a little "spicy" once in a while? Bring some surprise in to your life tonight, K? Rooting for you, as always.
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
Just to let ya'll know, I am probably going to move to piecing when this thread locks or before if I get my "sign". I think almost a year is enough time spent here and while I will still be around here a lot, I think my own thread needs to reflect the state I HOPE my sitch is in.
Funny PL, we cross posted, you encouraging me to move on and me saying I was going to. Yes, it is time to let go of the affair. Actually, it's only when I post here that i really reflect on that part of my sitch. It's relativly gone from my daily thought. Now I am focused on making sure the next phase keeps us moving onward and upward!
life! 
Which I believe you are doing, correct? I am proud of you. And I as part of your loyal cheerleading squad, look forward to hearing about the x2